Lady Donovan Phones Frank...Parts I through VI

Part One

Frank and his Lady! My first all dialogue, so understanding, please! (fics generally date between 4/02 & 6/02). III has a surprise.

Scene: Cell phone rings...kinda staticky on one end...


"What did you mean when you said 'I hate fire'?"

"Just that. I hate fire."

"Doesn't sound like an explanation Frank Donovan gives."

"I'm a succinct GQ fellow."


"I say what I mean."

"So you hate fire. May I ask why?"


"It's a long story."

"I've got time..3500 minutes to be exact."

"So you bought a new cell phone plan."

"Don't change the subject."


"Are you sitting down?"

"I'm on the train."

"Where are you located now?"

"We'll reach Malta in an hour."

"Malta. Near Glacier National Park and Malta's on the Canadian border. Beautiful country...that's where I have my ranch. All four hundred acres of her."

"You didn't tell me you had a ranch. Can I go see the ranch?"

"Can you drive a four wheel?"


"Because the ranch is an off-road ranch, hidden. Safe. I can text you the GPS location."

"Damn. I didn't bring my GPS locator."

"The location is difficult to explain over the phone. I chose the location because the ranch is so far off the road and you need a GPS locator to reach her."

"Sounds remote."

"It's nice. Custom built house, with jacuzzi, indoor and outdoor pools, huge picture windows and four hundred acres of privacy that backs up into Glacier National Park for even more privacy."

"That's a long statement for a succinct GQ fellow."

"Sometimes I like to explain things."

"Expanding, aren't you?"


"Now that's a succinct statement from a GQ fellow. You have the hazelnut coffee I like?"

"Yes. Freshly made."

"Are you going to have a cup?"


"I like that you picked up my coffee drinking habits."

"So am I. I miss you."

"I miss you too."

(Train whistle sounds)

"When did you buy this ranch?"

"Years ago. I bought the ranch off the state of Montana."

"People can do that? I mean, buy property off a state?"

(Frank chuckles)

"Yes. At least I did. A long time ago."

"You didn't tell me about this property."

(Frank chuckles again)

"That's the second time you've made that statement. You're a bit miffed at me, aren't you?"

"I would have liked to have known you had the ranch. We could have spent our vacations there, hunting wildlife."

"I never knew you wanted to hunt."

"My father used to take me hunting when I was a girl."

"In Montana, you have to pass a test if you want to hunt bears."

"Stop kidding me."

"Darling, it's intended to prevent mistaken identity killings of grizzly bears."

"So now the state wants us to take a test to go bear hunting?"

"If you want to bear hunt, you have to take the 15 question test."

"Sounds tough."

"It's a simple test, really, dear. I took the test on-line, and received a 93%."

"You got less than a perfect score?"

"One question wrong."

"I'll console you over dinner."

"Deal. So you'll take the bear identification test?"

"Uhm...let's just go wildlife looking."

(Frank chuckles again)

"You mean wildlife shopping. I know you and shopping."

"I'm a woman. I'm supposed to shop. Gives me therapy and relaxes me."

(Frank is concerned now)

"Is something bothering you?"

(Lady laughs)

"Shopping is one of the ways I unwind. I like to sit with my purchases..."

(Frank chimes in)

"...and drink a cup of hazelnut coffee with half and half."

"Yeah, something like that. I like people watching."

"You've too much stress in your life. Perhaps I should take you to my ranch."

"Our ranch."

"Yes, our ranch. Except that it's in my trust fund's name."

"You signed it over to your trust fund?"

"Yes. When I bought it. My mother was always adamant that I put property and money into a trust fund."

"Your mum taught you a lot of things."

"She was a special woman."

"I would have liked to have met her. Your Mayfair friends tell me your mother and grandmother were spies in the Great War."

(Frank pauses...)

"Not exactly spies. When were you in London?"

"I wasn't. I was in New York. They took the Concord over last week."

"I see. Did they tell you anything else?"

"Just that your mother and grandmother helped the M5. They didn't know how the Weissman women helped the British."

"They didn't."

"Damn. Just when I thought I could break into the Donovan Files."


(Lady chuckles) "I know all I need to know about you: you're warm, generous, romantic, and you're mine!"

"Thank you."

(Static sounds...) "You're welcome. So they were spies?"

"If they were, that would be classified information until 50 years after their deaths. Where are you sitting on the train?"

"Private bedroom. It's kinda nice. Nice picture window, private bathroom with a shower."

"No one can hear you. You swept for bugs?"

"Yes. No bugs in the room and no one can hear me."

"I'd ask you not to mention my mother and grandmother. They were special women."

"You miss them?"

"I miss them every day."

"Do you miss me?"

"Every minute. Will you kiss me when you get off the train?"

"Darling, I'll be expecting you to give me a passionate kiss and tilt me towards the floor so my leg lifts up in the air."

"That I can order up."

"You won't be embarassed at kissing me in public?"


"You're a succinct GQ fellow, remember?"

"I compartmentalize my life but I can be romantic."

"I'll be expecting that when I get off the train."

(Lady sucks in her breath)

"Ahhhhh, I'm passing the most beautiful mountain right now."

"I think I shall take you to my ranch. You know, I sell hay."


"Hay. To cattle ranchers and wild mustang owners who need feed."

"A working ranch?"

(Frank chuckles...)

"Yes, a working ranch. Alfalfa, prairie oat hay, grass hay."

"I'm a rancher's lady?"

"Yes, you're a rancher's lady."

"Do I get to wear jeans and cowboy boots with spurs?"

"If you want. I also graze wild mustangs."

"Horses! I'd love to go horseback riding."

"I'll have to rent some domestic horses, but yes, if you want, we can have horses there."

"So you're going to take me to our Ranch?"

(Frank chuckles...)



"After this next assignment, I'm assigning paid personal leave of two weeks to my team."

"So we can go in two weeks?"

"Not exactly. I expect the assignment to be over in about six weeks."

(Lady sighs sadly)

"Six weeks."

"It can't be helped."

"I know. I just miss you."

"I'll be seeing you soon."

"In a little over fifteen hours."

"You hate the planes don't you?"

(Lady says forcefully)

"Yes, I hate planes!"

"Easy, darling."

"I just hate planes."

"I know you do."

"My parents died in a single engine plane crash in the Bahamas. I was five."

"Good reason to hate planes. But I'll see you in fifteen hours and I'll kiss you passionately."

"I miss you."

(More static...train is travelling through countryside with no rebroadcasting signal)

"You were going to tell me why you hate fire."

"Yes. Wasn't I saying that?"

(Lady chuckles)

"No, we were talking about our ranch."

"Beautiful place. You'll love it."

"So you'll take me there?"

"You bet darling."


"In about six weeks. After I wrap up this next assignment."

"Oh yes. I remember. It's just when I think of my parents' deaths, I get upset and forget what I was talking about."

"It's understandable. You witnessed the plane crash. (Frank pauses...) We'll plant wildflowers on the ranch."

"We can?"

"Yes. She's a four hundred acre ranch, backing onto Glacier National Park. She has an excellent view of the glacier."

"Do we watch the sunset over the glacier from the window?"

"No, we watch the sunrise. And we'll need a telescope."

"Always thinking about spy equipment."

"Basically, I am a spy."

(Lady chuckles...)

"Can't be too safe."

"I will always make it safe for you."

"That's why I love you. You make me feel safe and I forget what happened to me."

"I know you feel safe with me. I love you, too, darling. And I miss you."

(Static sounds again...)

"Ditto here. This static is getting to me. Can't you have Cody fix it?"

"I'll have him look into it. Perhaps I have him put a rebroadcasting signal somewhere on the ranch."

"Wouldn't they be able to pick the signal up?"

"Hmm. I think you're right, but I'll ask Cody."

(Static sounds more louder...Lady's voice starts fading out...)

"Frank? Darling? I love you!"

"I love you too!"

"I want to know why you hate fire."

"I promise I'll tell you over steak at Morton's."

"I want rib eye."

"I want you."

"Frank! You romantic! You said you were a succinct GQ fellow!"

"I do read Razor magazine now and then."

"Ooooooo! I like this new Frank! I'll pick up a copy at the train station."

"In Chicago?"

"No, in Fargo. We stop there for twenty minutes."

"More time for me to miss you."

"I'll miss you more, snookums!"


"Pet name. You have another name you want me to call you by?"

"I'll whisper it in your ear."

"I simply must read this Razor magazine."

(Static sounds more frequent).

"What's that? I couldn't hear you, darling. Too much static. You must be in the countryside."


(Frank speaks louder)

"We'll have to hang up for a while."

"I miss you!"

"I love you, darling!"

Frank and his lady click off their cell phones simultaneously...Lady lays back in the bunk bed in the private bedroom on the train and enjoys the view of Montana. Frank sips his lady's favorite hazelnut coffee as he lounges on a leather couch in front of a fire.

LADY Donovan Phones Frank, Part II: An Hour Later

Frank sat back on his sienna colored leather couch. He pulled a small table next to the couch.

He sat back, sipping the hazelnut coffee his wife enjoyed, and stared into the fire. He missed his wife, and although he knew she enjoyed her train trips, for taking the train gave her time to write, and to see the countryside, Frank wished she would take a plane occasionally.

Her parents had died in a plane crash, and she'd been waving them goodbye alongside her grandparents when she watched as the plane had trouble taking off. Once the plane was airborne, it had barely reached 200 feet when the plane suddenly nosedived and crashed into the landing strip, exploding upon impact.

His wife had watched in horror as her mother's arm was flung towards the airport window where her daughter was watching.

The arm had bounced off the window in front of his wife's face. She'd covered her face and cowered in terror behind her grandmother.

This was the reason she took trains. Travelling internationally was difficult for her, and she usually took freighter cruises to get across the Pacific, and a combination of trains and Nova Scotian freighters to get to Europe.

It was a bulky, time consuming way of travelling to Europe: first the train to Nova Scotia. Then, a ferry or small freighter or even one of the larger fishing boats that was doing a run to Greenland. From Greenland, there existed numerous ferries between Greenland and mainland Europe, notably Denmark, for Greenland was under Danish control.

The entire trip usually took around ten days, which cut into their vacation time. On the occasions when she'd had no option but to take planes, Frank had paid for a first class cabin on Virgin Atlantic, and had ordered tranquilizers. This arrangement was accepted by his wife, but only as a last resort.

She much preferred trains. Time for herself, and time for her writing. Time to wind down.

So now Frank sat, lonely, missing his wife, and sipping her hazelnut coffee as the fire kept spitting and popping in the fireplace.

Frank was so lost in thought that he didn't hear the cell phone ringing insistently.

(Cell phone ringing...Frank starts as he finally hears the phone)

"Darling! It's been ringing for what seems like forever!"

"I'm sorry. I was wool-gathering."

"Missing me?"

"Terribly. How far are you from Malta?"

"We're just pulling in. The mountains are gorgeous. You simply must take me to our ranch."

"I promised. I don't go back on my promises."

"I know. What are you doing now?"

"Sitting on the couch in front of the fire, missing you."

"You were drinking my hazelnut coffee weren't you?"

"I wanted to share tonight with you. Since I couldn't spend tonight with you, I decided to share something that you love."

"I'm sorry. It couldn't be helped. Business..."

"Sucks." Frank finished her sentence when she trailed off.

"I know. I'm glad you miss me."

"You'll be home tomorrow."

"And you'll kiss me on the train platform."

"A kiss to remember."

"How could I ever forget your kisses? Your sensuous full mouth on mine sends shivers down my spine."

"A poet."

"You're smiling." (she is right. Frank is smiling...)

"What makes you say that?"

"I can tell by your voice."

"What kind of tones in my voice makes you think I'm smiling?"

"It's, well, I don't know. Your voice is pitched differently. I can't explain it, but the tones tell me you're smiling."

"Instinctual. Humans have instinct for tones of voice."

"How so?"

"Think about someone screaming. There's what I suppose is called a happy scream, like when someone's won something they didn't expect to win. Then there's the fear scream. Humans know a fear scream from a happy scream by the tones in the voice."

"And humans developed tone differentation as a means of survival?"


"Kinda like the distress call of a baby alligator."

(Frank chuckles...) "Yes. It's like that. Any adult alligator who hears the distress call of a baby alligator will come to the aid of the youngster."

"So humans learned how to recognize fear in the tones of a scream and come to the aid of the one in distress?"

"You've got the idea."

"So that's why I said I can hear you smiling."

"That's right. And you are right, I am smiling. I'm smiling because I'm talking to you, and even though you're not here, I can hear how much you miss me."

"I do miss you. Sometimes I hate myself for hating planes."

"Don't blame yourself. All children feel safe with their parents and when something happens to their parents, the kids don't feel safe anymore. You saw your parents die, and you don't feel safe in planes."

"I still feel bad for taking so much time away from you and our children."

"In some ways, it's good you do that...spend time away from the kids. They learn to depend on themselves and that teaches them responsibility. You need time for yourself, to tend to your own hobbies, your own interests which are outside of the interests of our family. The kids will be grown up one day and if you haven't developed your own interests and hobbies over the years, you'll have a difficult time adjusting to life without the kids."

"I suppose you're right. But I'm their mother, and I feel bad about being away from them."

"You can worry. There's no harm in that. You're feeling separation anxiety and thinking you're not going to come back alive."

(a small intake of breath as she realizes Frank has hit upon something...) "I, I sometimes think that my business trips are the last time the kids will ever see me."

"Sweetheart, I feel the same way. Every day I go to work, there's a criminal intent on taking me down."

"The kids are okay?"

"They're sleeping over at their friend's house tonight. Tomorrow's a school holiday and tomorrow night they're attending overnight shabbat services."

"I miss them as much as I miss you."

"They're fine, sweetheart. They're growing up, developing their own interests in life, discovering what they can do. It's important for the kids to develop strong relationships with other people."

"Socialization. I wasn't socialized much after my parents..." (her voice trails off...)

"Your grandparents were afraid of losing you as well as their daughter."

(Lady Donovan sniffles) "They rarely let me out of their sight. They kept checking on me every half hour when I was in my room. If I was in a school activity, they kept calling or coming around the school to see if I was okay. That bothered me."

"Too much parental oversight tends to dislodge a child's confidence. He begins to feel that he can't do anything right, because his parents keep looking over his shoulder and supervising his every move. This is why I sent the kids over to their friend's house and over to shabbat services tomorrow night."

"Fostering indepdence."

"Fostering confidence in their social skills."

"Do they miss me?"

"Of course they do."

"They didn't sound like they were going to miss me when I left."

"Darling, many kids behave that way. They view a temporary parental absence as a good thing."

"A good thing?" (she is fakes being shocked)

(Frank chuckles...) "It's not a shocking behaviour. Didn't you want your grandparents to sometimes leave you alone and go off somewhere?"

"Well, yes."

"That was because you were developing your independence. All children must develop independence at one time or another."

"But the kids sounded happy about my trip."

"They were happy they were going to overnight shabbat services. I told them that just before you said you had to go on an emergency business trip."

"So they weren't happy about my trip?"


(lady donovan interrupts...) "Snookums?!"

(Frank chuckles...) "Sweetie, kids live for the moment. Yes, they were happy to be going to shabbat services. And yes, they were happy that you went on a, no, no. Don't start sniffling. I'll tell you why they were happy. They were happy you were going on a trip because they could spend some time alone with me. Quality time with Daddy."

(Lady Donovan blows her nose...) "I suppose you're right. Your job makes it tough for you to get alone time with the kids. I have them so much I forget sometimes that they don't have a lot of alone time with you."

"And all kids need some face time with both their parents, and face time with each parent without the other parent around. That's how quality relationships are built with children."

"When you put it that way...I suppose I am happy the kids were happy to have me going on a business trip."

"They wanted face time with me, alone. Today and tomorrow are school holidays. The kids and I went to the park and played soccer for a while. I taught them a few beginning Krav Maga moves."

"They must have loved that!"

(Frank chuckles again...) "You're right. They did love daddy teaching them martial arts moves. Chris wants to be a martial arts expert."

"Thought he wanted to be a doctor?"

"Kids change their minds frequently."

"Tell me. Last year he wanted to become a train engineer."

"That's because you took him and Olivia on a business trip with you. Quality time with mommy."

"I forgot about that. You didn't feel left out?"

"No. I have interests outside of this family, just as you do with your writing, and your jogging, and your girlfriends."

"You're right again. I suppose I'm just too clingy. Marriage to a psychologist can give me a lot of insight into myself."

"It's natural to feel that way, especially after losing your parents the way you did."

"What does Olivia want to be?"

"Same as always: a television reporter. She says she gets to go into everyone's home at the same time every day."

"She's sweet."

"She's like her mother. Now you're smiling."

"How can you tell?"

"By the tones in your voice."

"Where are you now?"

"Curled up on the couch, watching the fire spit and pop."

"Drinking coffee?"

"Drank coffee. Ended up drinking the entire pot."

"The large pot?"

"Yes. I made the twelve cup pot of coffee."

"You're going to be a bit hyper tonight."

"I'll work it off practicing Krav Maga."

"A long workout."

"It will be worth it. After the manhunt, I decided I needed to bone up on additional street skills. That old guy who blasted a hole in his trailer wall with his gun really threw me off."

"Why did he do that? I mean, blast a hole in his trailer wall? Those can't be repaired easily."

"I guess he thought he was protecting his territory. Scared off my quarry is what he did. I don't like to shoot to kill, but when he took that hostage, I had no choice."

"The small talk in the coffee shops in Seattle was about the manhunt. Some people were of the opinion the FBI used too much force."

"The FBI doesn't like to use force unless it's absolutely necessary."

"Sometimes it can't be helped."

"Not in this case. There would have been no reasoning with him."

"So it was either him or he could have killed the hostage."

"Yes. He would have shot the hostage and dumped him out of the truck, despite being surrounded."

"Would he have tried to flee again?"

"Yes. Slipping down in the seat and gunning the engine would have propelled him forward. Or, he could have put the truck into reverse and mowed down my agents."

(Lady Donovan sucks in her breath...) "Alex and Jake were there?"

"They were."

"I suppose I thought of them as being back at the nest. He would have mowed down Alex and Jake like PR Princess Lizzie Grubman?"

"Something like that. She plowed into a group of people. Our quarry, had he chosen to flee, could have put the truck into reverse, gunned it, and plowed down my agents. Instead of just injuring a group of people, like Lizzie did, he would have killed."

"You had no choice."

"No choice. Zero option."

"He forced you into that choice."

"That he did."

"The Seattle papers said he was in for life, no chance of parole and that he'd threatened suicide."

"His escape was his way of going down on the outside. He wanted to feel the earth beneath his feet once again. He didn't want to die in prison, caged up like an animal. He wanted to die outside."

"A police assisted suicide?"

"Hmmm, yes, that's one way of putting it. He wanted to kill himself because he felt trapped in prison society. He had an antisocial personality and didn't feel remorse for killing whom he saw as an obstacle to his freedom."

"But wouldn't he see prison as a way of fostering his beliefs?"

"No. He was forced to follow prison rules, which didn't allow him the freedom to choose his own beliefs regarding others. He had to respect people from other races, and people who practiced other religions. And that irked him. He was in for life, with no chance of parole. He saw escape as a means of getting out his trapped life."

"So he felt that he had enough of a chance to get away?"

"That's right. He felt that the woods and the stream gave him an opportunity to hide, an opportunity to get away. He took that hostage as a last resort when he saw himself being surrounded."

"Did he have sympathizers who would have helped him get away?"

"We're looking for some, but yes, there exists an underground network. Once his escape hit the news, there would be other people who would have been more than willing to assist him in escaping."

"So, they would have jumped in their cars and came to his assistance?"

"Something like that. There would have been a code word used as a signal. Once he was picked up by someone in the group, he would have gone underground and the FBI would have had a tough time in locating him."

"But you're the best, honey. You would have found him."

"Not without a lot of extra manpower and a lot of time."

"But you would have found him."

"Yes, but with a lot of difficulty."

"Would he have escaped to Canada?"

(Frank hmmmmms here, stroking his chin thoughtfully...) "Hmmm. Now that's something I didn't think of, but yes. Yes, it's possible he could have escaped to Canada."

"Canadian police work with US police."

"True. But there are a lot of places to cross the border undetected, even with the additional security cameras installed along the northern border."

"Don't the cameras feed into a central center?"

"Yes. But they can be activated easily by an animal, or by someone hurling something across the border."


"Along the border, there are several spots where the border patrol has been beefed up because there are backpacks containing marijuana which are left on the other side of the shallow ditch separating Canada from the US."

"So the people will hurl the backpacks across this ditch? Can't they make the ditch wider?"

"Possibly. And yes, the backpacks are hurled over the border, and the payment is hurled back stateside in a backpack. The people doing the business come to the border under cover of darkness and collect their respective backpacks."

"Strange way of doing business."

"Drug dealers come up with the most interesting ways of transacting their businesses."

"That's why they have you to help catch them."

"I'm FBI, not DEA."

"But you work with DEA, sometimes."

"When the case calls for it, like if the drug money is being laundered."

(Lady Donovan chuckles...) "Like when you ran Andrew into jail for transporting cocaine via his yacht in the Hamptons."

"Like that time, yes."

"We should rent a yacht one day."

"Did you want to do that? Rent a yacht? I do enjoy sailing, you know."

"Yes. I'd like that. You don't have a yacht in your trust fund do you?"

(Frank chuckles...) "Not yet."

"But you have the ranch. I can't wait to see it."

"It's beautiful. Like you."

"You're too sweet."

"I'm just stating the truth."

"I know. I like to hear the truth."

"I'm always truthful with you. You have sharp fingernails. You'd scratch my back, deeply."

"Your Krav Maga moves should allow you to subdue me."

"I'd like to subdue you right now."

"Really? What would you do?"

"Take you down. On the bed."

"Would you have my hands over my head?"

"That I would. Best way of taking you down."

"You scamp!"

"You know you like it."

"You're right."

"Kids won't be there tomorrow night. I expect dinner, dancing and bed."

"That's a deal."


"Mortons it is. They've got a new dessert chef."

"You're all the dessert I need."



"I'll remember that." (incoherent speaking over the cell phone)

"What's that, dear?"

"Dinner call. I'm being summoned."

"What are you having?"

"Chicken cordon bleu, mixed greens and baked potato with the works."

"Morton's will be better."

"You'll be better than the dinner I'm having tonight."

"You're sweet."

"I'm your wife, I'm supposed to be sweet."

"What are you having for dessert?"

"Black forest cake."

"No coffee?"

"Amtrak doesn't exactly make the best coffee. Too thick and muddy."

"Didn't you bring the French coffee press I gave you?"

"I didn't have room to pack it."

"Tea for you, then."

"I suppose so."

"Tea is good."

"Not with milk and sugar."

(Frank chuckles again....) "That's the way the British drink their tea. And the way my mother drank her tea."

"With milk?"

"Yes. It's good."

"I don't like it."

"That's because your palette isn't used to tea with milk."

"I'm used to Lipton."

"Lipton is not a good tea."

"I did slip some herbal tea bags into your purse."

"You did?"

"Yes, in your secret pocket."

"You know about that?"

"I do."

(Sounds of rummaging come over Frank's end of the phone...)

"You did! You did put herbal tea bags in my purse."

"Amtrak isn't the best with coffee."

"They could use a Starbucks."

"Now that would make a good business partnership."

"You're right. It would. Better choice of coffee."

(sounds of knocking coming over Frank's end of the phone...) "Darling, sounds like you're being summoned again."

"The Queen's duties never end, do they?"

"Never. I love you."

"I love you as well. Give my love to the kids tomorrow."

"That I will do."

"Miss you."

"Miss you too."

"I don't want to hang up."

"Neither do I."

"I'd take the phone into the dining room, but I don't want to be rude."

"Some of our conversation isn't for other ears. I'll be thinking of you."

"When you're practicing your Krav Maga moves, think of me."

"I don't want to fight you. I want to make love to you."

"Now that's the thought I will hang onto while I'm having dinner."

"That's the thought I'll hang onto while I wait for tomorrow afternoon."

"I'll expect a fireworks display."

"That I can provide."

"Miss you."

"Love you."


"Bye, Missus Donovan. I'm glad you said yes to my proposal."

"Bye Mister Donovan. I'm glad you asked me to be your wife."

"It's been a wild trip."

"Loved every minute of it."

"Loved you every minute of it."




"Bye, love."

"Bye, love."

("last call for dinner, ma'am" Frank hears the conductor say)

"You'd better hang up. Your blood sugar will drop and then you'll get sick. And I want every minute of tomorrow evening with you."

"I'll take care. Bye love."

"Bye. Love you."

Frank clicks off the phone, for he knows his wife will get cranky if her blood sugar gets too low.

Frank stretches on the leather couch, and leans back into the leather arms. He smiles as he listens to the fire spit and pop. After a while, he gets up, and takes the coffee pot and his cup to the kitchen, placing them on the sink. He repairs to the bedroom where he changes into workout clothes, goes to the house's exercise room and begins to practice Krav Maga.

Lady Donovan Phones Frank Part III
Frank makes a call to her

setting: The Donovan Master Suite, which comprises the entire third floor of their new home

(landline phone calls cell phone...)

"I'm here."

"Did you enjoy dinner?"

"I dined alone, without you, and the dinner wasn't so hot without you across from me."

"You're back in the train's cabin?"


"What are you wearing?" (low sultry voice)

"What I had on this....ohhhhh. I understand. (pause pause pause). What are you wearing?"

"Take a guess." 

"Mmmmmmm. Did you use the scented gel I bought you?"

"Yes. The Biotherm. It was nice, but I prefer the Burberry scent. Musk makes you wild for me."

"That I know."

"You on the bed?"

"On the chaise, actually."

"The one by the window?"

"That is correct, my Lady. The kids called before they went to bed."

"Do they miss me?"

"Yes they do."

"Why didn't they call my cell phone?"

"Largely because of the long distance charges to the Wenners."

"Ohhh. Gotta get them a phone card."

"Not a bad idea."

"Do you miss me?"


"As do I. Did you work off the caffeine in the coffee you drank?"

(Chuckles softly). "Actually, my Lady, I bought the decaffeinated coffee."

"You scamp!" 

(low sultry voice) "Give me another nick."


"Stud?! A common nick. (low sultry voice) Give me another nick."







(sound of metal crunching on Frank's end)

"Call you back." Frank hangs up, then dials 911 and leaves the landline phone on the line so the 911 operator will trace the call. He bolts through the bedroom door, down the stairs and out the front door. 

He sees two cars, one of which has wrapped itself around the tree in the front yard. He sees two bodies on the ground. Kneeling, he automatically checks the pulse of the teenager closest to him and finds no pulse, because while the body is on its stomach, the head is face up--the neck is broken. 

Frank looks at the other teenager's body lying a few feet away from the boy. He knows she's dead because she has been decapitated in the impact. 

"Are they? Uh, are they, uh...." a male voice asks.

Frank looks up, then stands up. He takes the teenage boy and leads him into the house. 

Sitting the teenager down, Frank says, "Yes. They're both dead."

The teenager pales, and starts trembling. 

"What were you teenagers doing? Were you dragging?"

"They, uh, my girlfriend, wanted to drive Tony's car."

"How old was she?"


"Eighteen," Frank repeats.

"Yes. Tony just bought his car with his gambling winnings."


The young man looks shaken. "Uh, we went to Canada."


"And we gambled."

"Are you eighteen?"


"Tony is eighteen or nineteen?"


"When did you go to Canada?"

"Last weekend. We went to Montreal. Tony won two hundred thousand dollars. Then he bought the Ferrari used."

"Canadian dollars or American dollars?"

"American dollars."

"Were you drinking?"

"No. I'm Mormon."

"Was Tony or..." Frank trails off.


"Was Tony or Chanteuse drinking?"


"I'm FBI, Mister...."

The young man looks scared. "Gerald."

"Gerald." Frank looks at Gerald. Gerald knows what Frank wants.

"Gerald Michael Donovan."

"Frank Donovan, FBI."

"You've got my last name."

"Appears so. Was Tony or Chauteuse drinking? They're dead, I will remind you."

Gerald looks guilty. "Yeah," he admits. "Chanteuse is uh was a bit of a wild girl. My parents don't like her but yeah, she drinks--drank."

"What was she drinking?" 


"How many beers?"


"And you let her get behind the wheel of a car?"

Gerald gets hot. "She said she wanted to ride in the Ferrari so I let her. I pulled ahead, and next thing I know, Chanteuse drives up behind me really fast and yells out the window." Gerald falls silent and hangs his head. 

Frank puts his hand under Gerald's chin and lifts it up. Gerald is crying.

"Gerald," he says softly.

"She, she," Gerald's voice breaks. "She, uh, she yelled through the window that she was going to drive for a while. I told her to stop the car, that I'd drive her if she wanted."

"And she tried to pull ahead of you and lost control of the car."


"Who gave her the beer?"

Gerald looks to the side. "Some guy."

"What guy?"

"I don't want to get him into trouble."

Frank looks stern. "Remember, I'm FBI." 

"The clerk at the Fast Mart down on Oak. He used to be a boyfriend of Chanteuse's."

"Boyfriend? How old is he?"


"Were you at the Fast Mart when she bought the beer?"

"Yes. I tried to stop her. I'm Mormon. I don't drink."

Frank changes subjects. "And what was Tony doing?"

"He was uh," Gerald looks sheepish.

"I already saw the joint on the ground."

Gerald turns his head, trying to avoid Frank's eyes. Frank puts his fingers under Gerald's chin and turns Gerald's head towards him. "Did you know Tony smoked pot?"

"Yeah. But I thought he didn't have any on him."

"And why is that?"

"We just came from church."

"That doesn't stop someone from carrying pot."

"He was always smoking pot. I kept trying to get him to stop smoking pot, telling him it would mess up his mind."

"You were right to try and stop him."

"I feel so guilty. If only I'd done more, if only I hadn't let Chanteuse ride in Tony's car." Gerald sniffs. "I knew Tony smoked pot. I should have known Chanteuse would want to drive the Ferrari. She's always wanted a boyfriend with a nice car. As you can see..." Gerald's voice trails off

"You have nothing to be ashamed of," Frank says softly. "You tried to help a friend who didn't want to be helped. You weren't at fault," Frank says softly. He released Gerald's chin and Gerald's head hangs down.

Frank puts his hand on Gerald's shoulder. Sirens in the background tell Frank the 911 operator has traced the call and has dispatched ambulances and police.

"Stay here," Frank says to Gerald. Gerald nodded his head. Frank walks to the front door and steps outside. On the other side of the street, a small crowd has gathered. Someone is taking pictures.

Frank walks over to the impromptu photographer. "Put that away," he says softly. 

"Hey, it's public information, mister," the man with the disposable camera replied.

Frank smiles cynically. "Not when it's FBI," he says and takes the camera from the man's hand. Dropping it onto the ground, he crushes it with his heel, glares at the man, then spins on that same heel and walks back to the wreckage of the Ferrari. The man is spluttering. 

"Did you see what he did? He smashed my camera!  I'm gonna tell the police. That's destruction of property!" 

Frank ignored the rantings of the man. He'd have to arrange for his kids to remain at the Wenner's until shabbat services began at sundown. Frank didn't want his kids to see where the two teenagers died. The Ferrari was literally wrapped around the maple tree. 

Frank hears a car pulling up and footsteps behind him. He turns around.

"Agent Donovan."

"Officer Manchester."

The man who was taking pictures came over. "Hey, this man broke my camera!" 

Officer Manchester looks at the man, then nods towards Frank. "May I introduce Special Agent Frank Donovan, FBI. This is his property."

Seeing the two bodies, Officer Manchester pulls out his radio and calls for a second ambulance while the man pales, and tells Frank: "I, uh, I, erm, didn't know. Hey, man, I'm sorry. Right? Sorry." He backs away. Frank is gazing at him steadily. The man turns then walks back across the street to join the rest of the onlookers. 

The red lights of the ambulance highlighted Frank's face. The paramedics jumped out and Frank said, "you'll need body bags," before the paramedics could get out resuscitation equipment.

"Uh," the paramedics are shocked. 

"Two bags," Frank says. "You two are fairly new, aren't you?" he asks them. The paramedics nod. "The teenage girl is decapitated and the teenage boy's neck is broken."

The two paramedics swallow hard and look at each other as they pull two body bags out of the ambulance.  They walk around the wreckage and then stop. One turns and throws up.

"You can put blankets over them," Officer Manchester tells them. "You talk to the other drivers?"

Frank nods. "Yes. Gerald's inside my house. The girl drank three beers."

"And the boy was trying to roll a joint," Officer Manchester says, looking at the ground next to Tony's body.

"Yes. Gerald told me Tony just bought the Ferrari."

"Joy riding."


Officer Manchester shakes his head. He looks at Frank, who nods at him. Officer Manchester goes into Frank's house to interview Gerald. Frank follows him. 

Twenty minutes later, Officer Manchester comes out of Frank's house. The two bodies have been removed and put into the waiting ambulances. 

"Are your keys in the ignition?" Frank asks Gerald as the two come out of Frank's house.


"I'll drive you home. Where do you live?"

"Uh, the Mormon Mission Home."

Frank nods and indicates they should go to Gerald's car. Frank gets in the driver's side and starts the car. He looks out the window at the small crowd of neighbors, who begin to disburse. Frank waits until the last neighbor has gone and then drives Gerald home. 

(Three hours later.....a cell phone rings...)
"Honey? What happened?"

"A car crashed into the tree."

(a sharp intake of breath) "My god..." (her voice trails off...Frank knows what she wants to hear)

"Two teenagers dead."

"Dead! My god! In our front yard! Frank!" (Lady D's voice is agitated)

"We'll stay in a hotel this weekend."

"Frank, what..." but his voice, soft and calming, interrupts her.

"Darling. I'll tell you later. Just listen to the sound of my voice (Frank is speaking softly and with an even tone). Everything will be all right. I've taken care of the surviving teenager."
"A survivor? My god..."

"He was driving the second car. Darling, I'll tell you about it tomorrow, after you've gotten a good night's sleep."

(Lady D sniffs and blows her nose) "If you say so."

"I do."

"You said that to me on our wedding day."

"I remember. I'm looking at our wedding picture now."

"You're in the den?"

"Yes. I've just been wandering around the house after driving Gerald back to the Mormon Mission Home."

"Gerald's the other teenager?" 

"Yes he was. You know, every day I dodge criminals and sometimes I am forced to kill. But tonight? Tonight two teenagers died in our front yard. Drinking? Yes. Using marijuana? Yes. They made a stupid mistake and they died for that mistake. And they died in our front yard."

"Did you break the news to their parents?"

"No. The police did that." (Frank strokes his chin) "But now that you mention it, I believe Chanteuse and Tony's parents will be paying us a visit tomorrow."


"To see the crash site. To leave flowers. Their friends will be doing the same."

"Roadside memorial. That's what happened when the SUV flipped over on the interstate. People left flowers at the crash site."

"They were just teenagers. While they were drinking and driving and while one was smoking marijuana, they were just kids." (A tear slips out of the corner of his eye)

"Those are killer substances."

"I know."

"Do you know who provided the beer to them?"

"Yes. The clerk at the Fast Mart on Oak."


"Is Paul 23?"

"Hmmmm, if he just graduated college last year, we might be talking about the same man."

"Gerald said the clerk is 23 and used to date Chanteuse."

"Noooooo. I don't think we're talking about the same man. Paul is gay."

"No. Not the same man. The police will talk to the clerk who sold an underage minor alcohol."

"Will he go to jail?"

"The clerk? Probably. The family's attorney might try and get additional charges brought." (Frank smiles.) "You scamp. You got me talking about the crash when I told you I'd tell you about it tomorrow."

"You know you needed to talk about it."

Frank looks down. "You're right. Two teenagers dying in our front yard is quite different from when I take down a criminal. Thank you, sweetheart. Thank you for knowing me."

"I love you. Your new job is tough. Sometimes you need someone to listen to you."

"You're right. I do need someone to listen to me at times."

"You wanna talk about it some more?"

"I'd just like to hear you tell me about our wedding day."

"I was so happy."

"You were so beautiful."

"I'm not beautiful now?"

"You're beautiful every day."

"Thank you."

"Did you like the music I chose?"

"You know I did. A beautiful choice."

"A beautiful choice for a beautiful lady."

"You're beautiful yourself."

"I'm not handsome?"

"Handsome. Sexy. Intelligent. Romantic. Sensual."

"Beautiful. Sexy. Intelligent. Romantic. Sensuous."

"We're so similar."

"Two parts of a whole."

"I'm glad I married you."

"I'm glad I asked you. We've got two great kids."

"A great family."

"Couldn't ask for better."

(Lady D yawns.) 

Frank says, "You're tired."

"Traveling makes me tired."

"I'll sing you a lullaby."

"You will?"

"For my Lady, yes." Frank starts to sing the lyrics to "Mary Had a Little Lamb"

(Lady D laughs) "You scamp!"

"Scamp again? I'm not lambchop?" he says with mock surprise.


"Mmm. Getting closer."

"The beautiful one?"

"Now, now. I do sort of like that nick."

(Lady D yawns again.)

"Love, I shall let you get some shut eye. Dream nice dreams about me."

"I'd rather dream about you while you're next to me. But I'll tell you that I taped a picture of you on the window."

Frank smiles. "I am still looking at our wedding picture."

"I miss you."

"I love you."

"And I love you, beautiful one."

"Love you back, sexy."

"Those kids didn't get to say goodbye or I love you to their parents."

"That's why I always say I love you. In my line of work, you never know..."

"Love you bunches."

"I'd swim the ocean just to give you a kiss."



(Lady D clicks off the phone.)

Frank brings the phone to his lips and kisses it softly. He puts the phone down and walks through the house. He stops off in each of his children's rooms, and looks at their pictures, touching them lovingly. 

Finally, he finds himself outside his house, standing over the spot where two young adults died a few hours earlier. He hears footsteps and a young girl comes out of the shadows carrying a teddy bear. 

"Is this where...?" her voice trails off.

Frank looks at her. Her eyes are puffy from crying. He nods and she places the teddy bear next to the maple tree.

"She was my friend. She graduated high school a year early," the girl says, sniffling. She stands there a moment longer, and Frank reaches out to put his hand on her shoulder, but she turns and runs from the scene. 

Frank stands at the accident scene a moment longer, then he shakes his head sadly. Tears are running down his face as he stands in the moonlight. He turns and slowly walks into the house and goes in. Turning, he starts to shut the front door, but lingers a moment, looking at the maple tree with the teddy bear propped against the trunk. 

Frank wipes his nose with the back of his hand, and shuts the front door.

(phone rings...Frank snaps awake and sits up suddenly. He reaches over for the phone.)


"Hello Darling! I'm back from dinner. Did you enjoy your workout?"

"Sweetheart...(his voice is shaky). I'm so glad you called. Uhm, did I phone you earlier?"

"What's wrong? You sound a bit upset."

"It's nothing. Nothing, dear. Stress, I think. Don't worry yourself." 

"Did you fall asleep?"

(Frank sits on the edge of the chaise). "Yes I did fall asleep for a while." (he checks his watch). "For about a half hour."

"You have a bad dream?"

"Yes. It wasn't pleasant."

"What was it about?"

"Nothing I can't handle sweetie. Did you enjoy dinner?"

'I would have enjoyed it more had you been there."

(Frank smiles) "In the beginning of my dream, you said much the same thing about dinner."

"What else did I say?"

"That you love me."

"That I do."

"As I love you."

"Did the kids call?"

"They said they missed you."

"I miss them as much as I miss you."

"Tell me about what you did after dinner. I know you watched a movie."

(Lady D laughs) "You scamp! You know me don't you?"

"I can read you like a book." (Frank gets up and walks down the length of the third floor master bedroom. He goes to the window overlooking the front yard. He sees the maple tree, intact. There are no skid marks or teddy bears in front of the tree. Softly, he lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding.)

"I like it when you read me and I love the fact you know what I'm thinking and doing," his Lady is saying. 

"I know the lady I love," he tells his Lady. 

"And I know the man I love. In the movie, there's this mummy that keeps getting resurrected...."

(Lady D's voice is soothing to Frank, and his shoulders visibly relax as he continues to look out the window overlooking the front yard.)


 (the Donovans are on the phone; it's late and Frank is still shaken from his dream)

"And the man who plays Ardeth Bey looks like you, but with longer hair. Scrumptious!" 

"Thank you, my Lady." 

"You still sound a little shaken up. You want to talk about it?"

"It's nothing I can't handle. Just a bad dream. I've gotten too much stress lately."

 "You just returned to work! No, no, dear. I didn't mean it that way. It's not that I didn't enjoy having you home for those six months. It's just, well, it seems that you react differently with this job."

 "I've never done undercover work before even though my mother practically wrote the book on undercover work. I'm reacting to having to learn different ways of applying my skills."

 "Kinda like when I started my new job?"

 (Frank chuckles softly and a smile cracks his mouth) "Exactly the same thing. You felt out of your true element, having to learn new skills while applying your existing skills to the demands of the new job."

"It took me six months to settle into my new job. The sudden death of my boss....ohhhh! And you were off in classes for those six months."

 (Frank is smiling) "That I was. I really did need the time to study child and adolescent psychology."

 "For our children as well?"

 "Yes, for our children too."

 "Is it really true that drug users are emotionally trapped at the age when they first started using?"

 "That is indeed correct, my Lady. You know me, how I like to plan and how I don't like not being in control. Many of the criminals my unit goes after were heavy users as teens and some of them were left to the streets since childhood."

 "And taking those courses would better enable you to reach into their minds."

 "Correct." (Frank smiles broadly. He walks over to the chaise lounger, then changes his mind and goes to the small mini bar on the far side of the room, next to the fireplace. With one hand, he takes the stopper out of a crystal decanter containing scotch whiskey. He pours himself a small shot of whiskey.) 

"The clinking of glass tells me you're going to drink something. Mmmmm, the scotch?" 

"Guilty as charged. What's my sentence?"

 "Three rounds of lovemaking."

 "Accepted and entered into the record."

 "Love you."

 "Love you back, my Lady."



 "There's something I've been meaning to ask..."

 "And that is?"

 "Well, those courses couldn't have taken all of your time during the day..." (Lady D is interrupted by a soft noise from Frank.)

 "You know where I was during the day...the Academy and the University."

 "Did you receive additional training?"

 (Frank pauses the glass halfway to his mouth while he quickly debates his answer. To his wife, he did receive additional training in psychology courses but part of his days were also dedicated to learning advanced techniques in counterintelligence. Frank makes his decision and takes a sip of his whiskey. He swallows.)

 "My Lady." (he says this as a soft statement) "My Lady, the Academy's courses are rigorous and the post-graduate work courses I took at George Washington University were time demanding. The distance between GWU and the Academy in Quantico is more than sufficient to account for my time."

 (Frank had neglected, and still neglects to tell his Lady that with his beaching leading into his new job came the privilege of using a helicopter to get around the WDC region from Quantico. The helicopter cut down on the time needed to get from Quantico to various points in the Washington Region during his additional training in counterintelligence. Frank also neglects to tell his Lady that he'd finished the course work for GWU inside of a month.) 

"So that's why you were always a bit short on the phone. You were stuck in I-95's traffic! I remember you phoning in from the scene of that horrible accident just up from Quantico."

 (Frank nods then remembers he is on the phone) "I remember. Two dead."

 (Frank had been using ground transportation on that particular day and had been in the fifth car behind the car which had been, well, basically smushed by an overturned tractor trailer. The tractor trailer's driver had had a stroke; he survived but with some paralysis on his left side.)

 "The driver was in the rehab class at the hospital. I remember him quite well when I was going in for my own treatment. He'd be walking really slow down the hallways."

 "Are you having any pain still?" (Frank's voice is full of soft concern for his Lady.)

 "Not anymore. After the treatments were finished, the pain went away."

 "Porphyria is an unpleasant illness."

 "Tell me about it. When I was a child, the other girls at summer camp used to nag at me because my urine sometimes was a dark blue. They thought it was dye."

 "A genetic miscode. You're missing an enzyme which processes the glucose."

 "It was such a relief to finally understand why I'd been having stomach pains all my life. Misdiagnoses, round-robin doctor visits, umpteen gynecological visits, tubes in my stomach, and elsewhere...and it was porphyria. King George was said to have porphyria."

 "It's a little known illness. I think physicians have porphyria located under 'other diseases of humans.' I wasn't too happy with the amount of time it took to get you properly diagnosed."

 "You're such a dream. Always caring for me."

 "I love my Lady."

 "And I love you. I can't seem to say that enough. I am glad the miscode wasn't passed to our children."

 "Porphyria is treatable with the proper medication." (Frank takes a sip of his whiskey)

 "And proper loving by the spouse."

 (Frank smiles, then puts down his glass)

 "And love should be in the prescription given by every doctor."

 "I agree." (Lady Donovan yawns and Frank continues) "How about I read you a story, my Lady, and then you go off to slumberland?"

 "That would be wonderful! What are you going to tell?"

 (Frank smiles, slyly). "Once upon a time, there were two lovers."


 "Their names were Romeo and Juliet. Their love was pure, and true, although they were both very young by current standards." (Frank picks up his glass, sips, swallows, then continues).

 "Their families were feuding and they didn't want the two teenagers to fall in love. But kids, being kids, did the opposite of what their parents expected. And the two fell in love. Their families found out, and grew angry at the two lovers. Juliet, in order to avoid marrying a man named Paris, drinks poison that makes her appear dead for two days. Romeo finds out about Juliet's death, and goes to see her body. Romeo enters Juliet's tomb and finds Paris mourning his beloved Juliet. Paris challenges Romeo to a duel and Paris loses. Romeo then drinks poison and dies as he kisses Juliet's lips. Juliet, upon awakening from her poison drink, finds Romeo's body beside her, then takes his dagger and kills herself."  

"A story about love against all odds."

 "That's what we have here: a love against all odds. In my job, my family can be taken away from me in a heartbeat, or I can be killed by a vengeful acolyte of Sonny's or any of the other criminals I took down."

 "You're saying we should enjoy our love to the fullest every day?"

 "That I am. Romeo and Juliet had but a little time to themselves before their families tried to pry them apart." 

"Sometimes I feel like we're living in a Kurt Vonnegut short story. The one about Harrison Bergeron where everyone who is beautiful, or intelligent, or athletic has a handicap placed on their person by the Handicapper General."

 "Sounds like a nightmare world. Why do you think we live in the world of Harrison Bergeron?"

 "The Handicapper General has a device placed in the ears of people who are overly intelligent. A loud noise comes over the earphones every twenty seconds to disrupt the thoughts."

 (Frank knows what his wife means but intends to ask her because he senses she is shaky his new job.) "How does that apply to our life?"

 "Every time I feel safe, a criminal pops into our lives, threatening to take away the safety I feel with you."

 (Frank is concerned about Lady D's statement, and his concern shows on his face). "Do you think I'm going to get killed?"

 "Sometimes I think that I, or our kids, are going to be kidnapped, tortured and killed. But I don't want you to be unduly alarmed, dear. I know you are the absolute best at protection. How you manage to protect me and the children astounds me, every day. I don't know how you keep up your compsure under the strain. I've been reading about criminals, you know."

(Frank is genuinely alarmed but pleased that his wife thinks so well of him and his skills and this also shows on his face. The last fact relayed by Lady D surprises Frank.) "You've been reading up on on what kind of criminal cases?"

 "Probate. Drug. Homicide."

 "And which do you prefer?" (Frank knows many people are drawn to crime; especially lurid cases. Probate cases, in particular, fascinate people because probate cases expose the accumulated assets--both financial and emotional--of an individual over a lifetime. Probate cases, like the Marshall Estate, tend to fascinate the public because they can expose hidden grudges, sometimes pitting sibling against sibling, husband against wife's family, wife against husband's family.)

 "I think....probate. Death is usually natural, not inflicted by someone else."

(Frank nods to himself and a small smile plays out on his lips. He is pleased his Lady prefers Probate cases. Although many English--and Frank knows his own mother lived in England and his Lady's great-grandmother was from Cardiff, Wales) prefer murder mysteries, Frank deals enough with murder on a daily bais that murder intrudes into every fibre of his being. And he would prefer his Lady be interested in Probate, where the crimes are generally limited.) 

"Probate cases are interesting. Some can expose hidden grudges over a lifetime."  

"That they can do. Like the Marshall case. Do you really think Mr. Marshall was competent enough to make his own financial decisions?"

 "That would be for a judge to decide. But it certainly could bring the inheritance verdict into question."

 "I agree."

 "My Lady?"


 "Will you dream about me tonight?"

 "Of course! I dream about you every night!"


"Yes. I dreamt last night that we were ghosties."


 "We had died, and we became ghosts who welcomed other souls into the aftelife."

 (Frank thinks this dream is not good, as it indicates stress in his Lady's life. Everyone has stress but his Lady's dreaming about ghosts has Frank concerned. And he takes a sip of his 25 year scotch whiskey.) "Ghosts."  

"Ghosts. It was strange. We became ghosts and we were the welcome committee in the ghost world." 

"Why do you think you had this dream?"

 "I don't know. I know I am concerned about being away from you and the children."

 (Frank nods, and sips his whiskey again. Separation anxiety. His lady was experiencing separation anxiety.)

 "It's important that the children have time apart from the parents in order to practice their social skills. Likewise, it is important for the parents to have time away from the children to re-establish their pre-children relationship. You know as well as I do that becoming a parent means less time interacting with your spouse as an adult."

 "I know. It's just that sometimes I feel as if everything I do, everything I say, is guided by what's correct for the children. But sometimes I wonder.."

 (Frank is going to push her logic). "Wonder what?"

 "Wonder if our children would be smarter, or more social, or something if I didn't work or if I had co-slept with them during their infancy."

 "Our children are perfectly fine. And each is reading at least three grade levels above their classmates."

 "The result of Children's Shakespeare."

 "The result of their parents treating them as intelligent humans, albeit young humans."

 "We do tend to read stories above their grade level. Like with Olivia, when I read Watership Down to her over a month's time, she was so enthralled and she kept asking me to let her read parts of the page." 

(Frank smiles. He remembers his Lady reading Watership Down  to their daughter. He'd thought the book too...too...well, too old for their daughter, but Olivia had taken to the story like a duck takes to water as a hatchling.) "She's smart isn't she?"

 "Yes." (Lady D pauses before she continues.) "Do I worry too much about what other women think about how we are raising our children?"

 "At times, yes you do. Just as I worry about what other men think about how I am raising our children. I am career FBI and that does take a toll on children. I worry that at times, I am thought of as less than a parent than as a sperm donor for the children."

 "You are not a sperm donor! You raise the children just as much as I do! Why, just the other day, our daughter Olivia was telling people how she was going to deduce how the cake got stolen from her classroom. A regular young Nancy Drew she was! And she was telling her friends how she was going to solve the crime of how the cake got stolen from her classroom--just like her daddy would deduce it stolen!"

 (Lady D is indignant that anyone would have the gumption to think that Frank is less a father for his job and that thought shows in her voice.)

 (For his part, Frank smiles at the thought of their daughter telling her classmates she was going to be just like her daddy. And he takes another sip of his scotch.) "Point well taken. Children do tend to imitate parents."

 "And what about the fact that we've installed stereos in their headboards?" his lady wants to know.

 (Frank nods. The adult Donovans have had cassette players inset into the headboards of their kids' beds. For at times, the kids get nightmares, and after their parents comfort the children until the children drop off to sleep, the kids tend to fall asleep to their parent's croonings, then snap awake some time later. But the kids love listening to their favorite audio books--their son is predilected towards the sound-effects enhanced "Star Trek" audio books whilst their daughter tends to prefer falling asleep to to Amelia Bedelia stories on tape.)

"It does seem that our children have an insatiable appetite for audio books late at night."

 "Well I, for one, do not mind if the children take a flashlight and read under the covers." 

"Nor do I mind. The children will need to get up at their usual time the next morning, unless it's a weekend day."

 "And the kids will learn just how much they can read before they suffer the consequences of not getting enough sleep."

 "Exactly. Sometimes, kids need to learn the consequences--within reason, of course. Staying up until the wee hours late a few school nights will teach the kids that they need to plan their time a little better--exchanging less playtime for more reading time, and less television time for more reading time."

 (Lady D laughs) "For our kids will be very sleepy the next day in school! Mrs Thurmond asked about our kids' sleepniness the other day. I told her not to worry about it. That our kids were learning that surreptiously reading under the covers after bedtime would adversely affect their alertness during the school day."

 "And what did Mrs Thurmond say to that?"

 "She laughed. And said that she wished more kids would read under the covers at night. She wanted to know what the kids were reading. I told her they were onto The Three Investigators. And she gasped! Old blue haired Mrs Thurmond actually gasped!"

 "The Three Investigators is a series which was great during my school years, but has fallen by the wayside. It seems that Jupiter, Pete and Bob are not the kind of characters kids like to read nowadays."

 "Yeah? Olivia seems to think that Jupiter Jones is a teenage Frank Donovan."

 "She does?"

 "Yes. In The Mystery of the Whispering Mummy, Chapter Three, Olivia says that the description of Jupiter Jones was 'bang on' with her daddy."

 (Frank chuckles as he remembers that particular book. In that Mystery, a mummy 'whispers' and is hiding a fortune in jewels. In the third chapter, Jupiter had been listening in on the conversation at Headquarters via a modified walkie talkie, and neither Pete nor Bob had been aware of the fact. This action was very much what Frank himself did at times with his own staff.)

 "Ahh. If I remember correctly, Jupiter finds the jewels in a hollowed out corner of the sarcophagus."

 "You guessed correctly. Out of all of them, I prefer the Mystery of the Whispering Mummy  myself." 

"Really. I prefer The Mystery of the Green Ghost as my particular favorite."

 "Oh come on! You simply can not say that the Green Ghost is better than a lost mummy! One of the characters Whispering Mummy even carries the last name of Bey, just like Ardeth does in the Mummy movies!"

 "But nothing compares to the Mystery of the Silver Spider!"

 "Well, that story is set overseas and has the Three Investigators posing as juinor Intelligence officers for the US government....why, you scamp! The three teens are doing undercover work, just like you!"

 (Frank and his Lady laugh simultaneously. The Mystery of the Silver Spider does have the Three Investigators probing into the disappearance of a foreign country's emblem of royalty--a silver spider--and the investigative trio find themselves armed with a two way radio and a contact at the American Embassy. Naturally, the trio take down the bad guys, and restore the rightful Prince to the throne.) 

"I plead guilty."

 "And your sentence shall be, on top of the other sentence you have earned, a long night of confinement with yours truly. Of course, orange chicken, warm bread pudding and a bottle of Dom Perignon will be in attendance."

 "Naturally. A full stomach makes anyone predilected towards a night of loving."

 "You love-whore!"

 "Whore?" (Frank is rather excited at being referred to as a love-whore but he doesn't want to show this in his voice.)

 "The Drew Carey show made reference to the fact that Drew was a 'pity-whore' when he repeatedly sought sympathy from his friends whenever things got rough for him."

 (Frank is confused now.) "So, what is the reference to love whore?"


"It means that you are more interested in making love than anything else." 

(Ahh, now Frank understands. And he smiles.) "Love is important. And we can make a night of it. Soft music. A roaring fire, a bearskin rug. The Dom chilling out."

 "And us. Us just being a couple. Doing couple things while the children have fun with their own peers."

 "And one day the children will be doing the same things with the opposite gender that we are going to be doing tomorrow night."


 "Right. It's after midnight."

 "You know, I've been reading about this physiological development of the brain that starts about age eight. What's on with that?"

 "The brain tends to undergo physiological changes beginning around age eight. That means that the maturation process has already begun. The process takes about two years and during that time, kids will naturally slow down their learning processes."

 "Is that the reason why our son is going through a slowdown in his schoolwork?"

 "Yes. And despite what the professional educators will have you believe, our son is perfectly normal. It is a normal slowdown as a result of the puberty process beginning."

 "So he will catch up in a few years?"

 "Yes. He will catch up to the educators' standards in a few years. Think about the differences between a book suitable for an eight year old and a book that an eleven year old will read by himself. The language is simpler in a book for an eight year old but an eleven year old will be able to process complex thoughts, and emotions."

 "Is that why our son's taste in reading material is changing?"

 "Yes. And do you know what?"


 "I think you've managed to keep me on the phone for much longer than I had wanted you to remain awake." 

"I miss you. That's why I kept talking. Are you upset?"

"Not at all. But I know that you are sleepy, and that you are lying against the pillow with the covers up under your chin holding the phone to your ear. How about I hum something to put you to sleep?"

 "That would be very nice."

 (Frank begins to hum a tuneful song, slow and lulling. In his mind's eye, he sees his Lady's grey-green eyes shutting for a few moments, flitting open, then shutting again.)



 "I love you."

 "Love you too."

 "I'll hang up now."

 "Just until later on, when I pick you up at the station."

 "You bet."

 "Love you."

 "Love you back." 

(Lady has shut off her phone and Frank sits back on the chaise, balancing his glass of whiskey on his rock-hard stomach.  Frank relaxes even more into the chaise. His eyelids flutter up and down. Realizing he was falling asleep, he places his whiskey glass onto the floor next to the chaise. Before he knew it, his dark brown eyes have closed and he is breathing steadily.)




"Good morning, sleepy head!"  

"Morning to you, m'Lady." 

"You rested well. I can tell by the sound of your voice." 

"You're right. The dream apparently purged my anxiety." 

"Did you dream about me?" 


"What we were doing?" 

(Frank blushes a bit as he remembers. He brings his left arm up over his head and stretches his legs. He doesn't remember going from the chaise to the bed but he must have, for he has woken up under the silk sheets on the king size bed.) "Mmmmm." 

"You're blushing. I can hear it in your voice." 

(Frank chuckles) "Let's say it was a bit racy." 

"More than a bit racy, I'm betting." 

"You're right again. You could come work in the SOU. I could always use another psychologist on staff." 

(Lady D chuckles) "You know I'm not a psychologist. I'd never survive in that kind of work. I'm scared that you took on that job." 

"It's what I need right now." 

"It's sometimes scary. They keep your background secret don't they?" 

"They do." 

"Those guys won't be able to get to me and the kids?" 

"Not a chance." 

"Not when Frank Donovan is on the job?" 

"Not when I'm on the job." 

"I'm glad to know that. Do you know what I did?" (she giggles) 

(Frank smiles). "What?" 

"I stepped off the train for a moment when it was staying in the station for a few minutes. I went into a kiosk and..." 

"And? Your voice trailed off. What did m'Lady do?" (Frank is interested and he sits up in bed, the silk sheets falling to his waist.) 

(She giggles again). "hehehehehe. It's..." (she breaks into gales of laughter) 

(Frank is smiling, on the verge of laughing himself) "M'lady? What did you do?" 

"Ahem. I erhmm took a picture of myself." 

"What's so wrong...ahhh. You were being a bit naughty." (Frank chides his Lady, for he knows she is a bit shy; she had trouble taking off her shirt in Frank's presence that first time...not to mention having trouble in the hospital with medical personnel looking at her while she was giving birth to their kids.) 

"Really darling! I kissed your photo while one of those three dollar instant photo booths took my picture. Someone pulled back the curtain while I was in the booth and saw me kissing your rather large photo." 

"Really? How large was I?"  


(It's Frank's turn to chuckle) "My photo, dear." 

"8 by 10." 

"The one in the silver frame from the fireplace mantle." 

"You notice everything, don't you?" 

"That I do." 

"That's not all. So these two kids, lovers, I think, were giggling and looking in at me. The boy, he was about 15, asked me, 'what are you doing?' The girl, she was 13 or 14, just popped her bubble gum and she was reaching behind her in that time honored women's way of unsnapping her bra." 

"You stopped the kids from doing that?" 

"That I did. I told her she could save herself the trouble of unsnapping her bra." 

"How did she take that?" 

"She looked guilty. But she pleaded innocent." 

"Most people do plead innocent." 

"The boy wasn't too pleased I'd stopped them. He began to sputter at me." 

"It was his idea." 

"I gathered that from his reaction. The girl just twitched her mouth then turned and left, followed by the boy as the train conductor called a two minute warning. So I finished up with a few more sets of pictures." 

"Will you show them to me?" 

"Of course." ("Breakfast!" Frank hears faintly) "Oh my! Nice breakfast here on the train. French toast, thick with syrup and butter, coffee, grits, and scrambled eggs." 

"I've yet to decide on my breakfast." (Frank swings his legs over the edge of the bed and stands up. He walks over to the window and stands, looking out at the unscathed tree.) 


(Frank smiles. His Lady has stuffed a mouthful of food past her newly bonded teeth and tried to talk around it. He decides to play with her a bit.) "Bainne, aran, then some crowdie." 

"Huh? I had a mouthful." 

"I know."  

"You're smiling." 

"That I am, m'Lady." 

"Really now, what are you going to have for breakfast?" 

"I told you." 

"You did not. What language were you speaking?" 

"Scots Gaelic. Alex is learning the language and she's teaching the rest of SOU basic phrases." 

"So what did you say?" 

"Milk, bread and crowdie." 

"What's crowdie?" 

"Curded cheese made from freshly sour milk." 


"It's rather good. Jake made some a few days ago and served it with breakfast. He's becoming quite the gourmet now." 

"Cooking is good for the soul." 

"As long as it's good cooking." 

"Hear, hear. You've gotten some crowdie from Jake?" 

"No. I made some myself. Yesterday, after getting home from the office." 

"You didn't say that last night." 

"I wanted to surprise you." 

"What else have you cooked up for me, my gourmet chef?" 

"Clootie dumplings and cranachan." 

'Huh? I'm afraid I'm not up to date on those dishes." 

"They're Scottish dishes. A clootie dumpling is a spiced fruit pudding."

"What kind of fruit?"

"I used mixed, with cherries predominating."

"I knew you would. Now what's the other one?"

"Cranachan is a raspberry fruit cup with whipped cream and whisky. I'm making it later today." 

"Fruit with whisky. The Scots love their whisky."  

"Jake misunderstood the whisky part as the measurements were in metric. He added too much whisky." 

"He was a happy man for a while." 

(Frank smiles) "Yes, he was a happy man. Cranachan, made Jake's way, is whisky with raspberries." 

"Why did anyone invent the metric system?" 

"Works for Jake." 

"I'd say. What else have you made?" 

"A surprise." 

"What kind of surprise?" 

"You'll see when you get home." (Frank has walked to the bathroom now and turns on the shower, making sure the water is hot. He takes a seat on the small chair next to the shower.) 

"Tell me now, darling." 

"You'll have to wait. Brings more anticipation to the surprise." 

(Lady D's voice has gone sultry and she's pitched it low) "You won't tell me now, sweets?" 

"Not a chance. I know your tricks. Remember, I'm a psychologist." 

"Ohhhh." (Lady D is pouting) 

"You'll find out in a few hours." 

"By this afternoon?" 

"By this afternoon." 

"A small hint? Please?" 

(Frank capitulates, just a little and uses a French accent.) "Petit fours, madam." 

"Ooo, you've made a French meal!" 

(Frank raises his eyebrows; his Lady should join the SOU.) "Oui, madam." 

"What else? You've been quite the busy cooking man lately. Scottish, French." 

"Not so fast. You'll be here inside of twelve hours. You'll find out then." 

"A cocktail hour first?" 




"Single malt." 

"Alex has been doing her homework. I used to drink blended." 

"Monica's not been helping with Alex's research?" 

"She merely consumes Jake's cooking. Those two are beginning to hit it off." 

"Think they're, you know, doing it?" 

(Frank raises his eyebrows again. It's a consideration but he doesn't think so.) "Not really." 

"He's young, barely 30. He needs someone after being an orphan." 

"Very true. He needs a frameset within which to work, to develop himself."

"Didn't he get that at the Academy?"

"Yes and no."

"I'm confused."

"Yes, he received structure at the Academy but he didn't know how to apply it."

"And you can provide that framework."

"He has the ability to become a great agent."

"You think so?"

"I know so."

"You still didn't answer my question."

"What was your question?"

"Do you think Jake and Monica will hook up?"

"No. I think they're just going to remain friends."

"We'll see. How long has Jake been cooking gourmet?"

"A few months now. He's been helping teach Spanish at the homeless shelter and cooks up batches of cookies."

"That's sweet. Pardon the pun."

"Pardoned. I caught him at baking one time. He looked rather guilty."

"Why would he look guilty?"

"Living on the streets, baking cookies is not considered a man's job."

"People still have to eat."

"But not bake cookies. That's for the women to do."

"Ah. A division of gender labor. Women cook, men do the 'dirty' work."

"Basically. Still, Jake's developed quite the menu lately. He served us lunch earlier this week."

"What was the menu?" 

"Beef in red wine and truffle sauce, green beans with julienne carrots, roasted red potatoes with rosemary and garlic, fresh hot sour dough bread, and both apple strudle and apple dumplings for dessert."

"So that's why you had a bowl of soup for dinner on Tuesday!"

"Guilty as charged."

"He's getting that good? Maybe we should have him and Monica over for supper one night. You two could cook us ladies quite the meal."

(Frank raises his eyebrows for the third time. He likes to keep his private life separate from his professional life and it took a lot for him to accept the Team's offer of having a drink with them. His silence stretches for more than a few moments and his Lady notices.)

she asks, "Not such a good idea?"

"Not at this time."

"They're still mourning for Keller?"

(Frank notices his Lady has switched subjects rather quickly and he smirks) "They worked with him for a long time. Keller worked differently. He was more like family to them instead of a professional agent."

"And you want to keep some distance from them?"

"Right. Arm's length."

"It was just a thought."

"I know, sweetheart."

"You're not mad at me?"

"Why would I be angry?"

"I'm not sure."

"What would you say if I said I'd give you a hot tub treatment when you get home?"

"I'd say, Frank Donovan, you're on!"

"I thought you would."

"Would I still get my French meal?"


"When would the Scottish dishes come into play?"

"Later on. The spiced pudding holds for a few days."

"Ah. So cocktail hour is Glenfiddich and, and, carniehatch? Is that it?"

"Cranachan. The dish is traditionally served at harvest time."

"Raspberries with whisky and more whisky to drink."

"Actually the Glenfiddich is going into the whipped cream that's served with the raspberries."

"No cocktails?"

"You're the cocktail."

"Mmmmmm. And you?"

"I'll leave that to your imagination."

"I'll like that. Know what else I'd like?"

"I can guess."

"That's part of it. I'd like to be there, with you, right now. Damn that airplane crash."

"It's damned."

"Thank you. I wish I could fly without being sedated."

"We'll take the QE2 over next time we go to Europe." 

"That reminds me." 


"I've found a way to get from Canada to Iceland and then onto Scotland by ferry." 

"Wouldn't that be rather long?" 

"Yes...longer than the QE2." 

"But you can handle short plane trips without too much discomfort. Iceland's ten hours away by plane." 

"Six, if we drive to Toronto or train it overnight to Toronto." 

"Sweetie, it's about the same flight time from Toronto." 

"Oh. But getting there is half the fun. And snuggling with you while being rocked to sleep by the train is an enjoyable way of traveling." 

"I do like traveling with you, m'Lady." 

"And I with you. Now, I hear that you're to shower and the room, by now, should be nicely steamed. The better to keep your skin soft, my dear." 

"The mirror is fogging up rather nicely. We need to get a new hot water heater." 

"Taking too long for the water to warm up?" 


"I'll call Sears today." 

"I'd like that." 

"Busy day today?" 

"I hope not." 

"I hope not either." 

"I'll be waiting for you at the train station." 

"With anticipation?" 

"More than anticipation." 

"I can't wait until this afternoon." 

"Me either. I'll have some free time at lunch. Why don't you call then?" 

"That I will." 

"What will you do until then?" 

"Take a shower, same as you." 

"Wish you were here." 

"As do I. Then, I'll curl up and read a book." 

"Which one?" 

"Auel's latest read. Called Shelters of Stone." 

"Ah, lust and living amongst the Cro-Magnons." 

"I heard it's as good as her other four books." 

"You have them all." 

"They're good reads. Nice and thick. Cozy, even. On a cold winter's day when my husband's away." 

"Nicely put." 

"Thank you." 

"You're welcome."

"I shall let you go as I know you've to get to the office." 

"That I do need to do, m'Lady." 

"I love you." 

"Love you back." 

"Be there at the station?" 

"Wouldn't miss it." 

"Love you!" 

"Love you, sweetheart." 

(Lady D has clicked off. Frank puts down the cell phone and steps into the steamy shower.) 


 Lady Donovan Phones Frank, Part Six

"Ready for another gourmet lunch?" Jake's pleasant voice called from the Nest's kitchen. Frank had to admit that Jake's new hobby was quite beneficial: the delicious smells emanating from the oven whetted Frank's appetite, and he found he couldn't keep his mouth from watering.

"Is it ready?" Monica's voice called from where she was hanging upside down on what she called a 'backstretcher' and what Alex called a 'blood runner to the head." Frank could see Monica and made a mental note to move her new equipment to a more congenial location. 

"Now? Damn, Jake, you're going to spoil us all," called Alex from where she was sitting at the computer next to Cody. Frank couldn't see Cody but he knew Cody was surfing Ebay's antiques section again. Alex wanted to purchase something unusual for her condo and had requested Cody's adept assistance. 

"Frank? You gonna join us for lunch?" Alex called. He heard her stand up and her chair scrape back. Heels clunked across the floor as Frank pretended to be busy reading his online version of the Wall Street Journal. 

Frank felt a smirk play across his face. No one was in his office to witness it. His afternoon plans were to begin preparations for the boeuf bourguignon. His mother's Danita's recipe called for three and a half hours of cooking time; he'd already prepared meat and had left the meat to marinate in the burgundy and cognac wines (his mother's addition to the recipe). 

Alex now popped her blonde head into his office.


"Hmm? Oh, yes. Something about lunch."

"Yeah. Jake's cooking for us again."

"I'll be able to stay for a while. What's on the menu?"

"Rice, lamb and lentil soup, lime broiled chicken, seasoned string beans, stuffed potatoes and for dessert, another delicacy: Julia Child's three-chocolate bombe. Hey, where are you going?" she belatedly asked of Frank, who smirked again at her.

"Oops. Sorry," she said. 

"I will be taking the afternoon off. Personal business," he commented. "But I'll be able to take a bowl of soup and some of that sour dough bread you forgot to mention."

"Ooops. Sorry. I'm so used to the smell by now. Jake's learning how to use the bread making machine," Alex replied as she withdrew her lanky body from the doorframe and went towards the kitchen. 

Frank closed his online session, then stood to follow Alex to the kitchen. As he walked across his office, the cuffs of his dark grey wool slacks brushing against his shoe tops, the quirks of the nest's acoustics became clearer to Frank.

"This must be called the Donovan Effect," Cody's voice said, and Frank paused his steps to listen further.

"Donovan effect?" Monica's voice asked. 

"Yeah, he changes office procedures just enough to let us know he's not so aloof and makes us feel better about him," Cody said. 

"I think it's nice he's allowing Jake to cook us lunch. We all have to pitch in a pay for the groceries," Alex commented. 

"He did take a drink with us," Monica's voice was just a bit defensive. Frank smiled to himself and adjusted his bluish grey cashmere turtleneck sweater. 

"Glenfiddich," Alex said, her voice sounded full of smiles. "He was drinking blended whisky before."

"Before you enlightened him?" Cody's voice came back, a bit fainter and Frank realized the three were nearing the kitchen. 

"Yeah," came Alex's satisfied reply. Frank nearly chuckled out loud as he restarted his walk to his office door towards the kitchen. 

"Frank?" Jake asked. "You sure you don't wanna stay for the rest of the meal?"

Frank nodded and put down his spoon. "I have other plans. Personal." His clipped tones indicated he wasn't going to announce anything further about his plans. "But I will take a loaf of your sour dough bread home. It is Friday."

Monica couldn't help but smiling. She thought she knew why Frank was taking off this afternoon--she had her suspicions and those suspicions tended towards the amorous: she thought he had a lady on the side. 

She also knew he needed the time off desperately and each member of the team had had their own personal holidays. Cody and Monica had taken their holiday, strictly as friends, in the steamy city of N'awlins, trawling through the French Quarter, dining on crawfish and red beans. 

Alex had opted for Anguilla where she had lain on the nearly deserted beaches, soaking up the sun before returning very tanned from using her entire bottle of dark tanning oil. 

Jake, thinking back on his only trip outside the States, had thought long and hard, then opted for an Iceland trip--where he'd been pampered in the spas, had enjoyed surprisingly good Iceland gourmet food, although he'd been very glad he'd missed the winter buffet festival of Thorri, the Thorrablot, where one of the main food dishes comprised of shark buried in the ground for months, then dug up, cut up in to chunks and served raw and rotten. 

Upon his return, Jake hadn't been sure about his Iceland spa experience; it had been the first time he'd been inside a spa. But upon seeing more than a few well-known male personalities at the spa, he'd had less reservations and had found he'd enjoyed the experience. Now, he was urging the rest of the team to take a stopover to Iceland the next time they went to Europe. "Or just take a quick weekend trip. It's worth it," he told the team. 

"You sure? You ate two helpings of my beef in red wine and truffle sauce on Tuesday," he now said. In addition to his Iceland spa experience, Jake had been shopping in Reychavik and had brought back some rather nice outfits. Today he was sporting a rather thick cable turtleneck in a pale robin's egg blue. Worn over jeans and pair of boots, Jake looked comfortable. 

"That was a good meal, Jake. And this soup is just as good," Alex put in around a mouthful of lentil soup with rice and lamb. She was referring to the meal Jake had prepared on Tuesday. She was dressed in a black sweater and jeans. Monica had opted for an orange sweater and jeans, while Cody sported jeans, a long sleeved turtleneck and a leather bomber jacket. 

"Mmmmmmm," Monica and Cody both said as they each dipped a slice of toasted sour dough bread into their large ceramic bowls of lentil soup. 

"I'm sure. Thank you," Frank responded, pushing back his chair and standing up. Jake made to stand up but Frank motioned for him to remain seated. Jake nodded and took another slice of lightly toasted sour dough bread. Following Monica's example, he dipped his slice into his bowl of soup.

Frank walked over to the counter where three more loaves of Jake's sour dough bread were lying. Taking a plastic bag, he slipped one of the large bread loaves into the bag and tied it off. 

Turning around, he caught his team's eyes flicking away. They had been watching him. "It's good bread, Jake. You've improved since you started baking cookies," he told Jake who began to start, but his surprise well. 

"You're welcome."

"No hazelnut coffee?" Frank asked, raising his eyebrows just a bit. 

"If someone wants it, yes. I also have licorice tea for an after-meal drink," Jake replied as Frank nodded to him and then to the rest of the team before leaving the kitchen.

"Think he's got a lady on the side and the bread was just a cover?" Alex whispered. "He's acting like a man's whose got a surreptious date."

"Hmmmm, possibly," Monica responded, just as softly. 

"He's a man, he's got a man's instincts," Jake said, taking the platter of lime-broiled chicken from the rolling serving tray. 

"It's the Donovan Effect," Cody now commented again. "He changes his behavior to make us comfortable." 

"He did take a drink with us," Monica defended her boss again, then smirked because she found herself repeating her earlier words. She tugged on the collar of her sweater. 

"The Donovan Effect? Is that what you named it?" Jake asked Cody. 


"Good name," Jake commented. 

"Hey, this is good chicken!" Alex said, wiping her mouth with her napkin.

"Taste of the Islands," Jake replied and bit into a piece of the lime-broiled chicken. 

Walking on his soft-soled shoes across the office to his office, Frank smiled at his team's comments. If only his team knew of the acoustics of the nest, they might censor their own conversations. 

But his mind was on other things.

Reaching his office, he put down the bag containing Jake's sour dough bread. Picking up his wool coat, he put it on, then wrapped a plaid scarf around his neck. Taking up the loaf of sour dough bread, he took a look around his office, then stepped out and closed the door. 

Clinking sounds from the kitchen indicated that his team was enjoying a rather good lunch, courtesy of Jake, although the team, himself included, chipped in to buy the groceries for the lunches. 

And, he had to admit to himself as he walked across the near-silent office, he'd picked up a thing or two from Jake. 

Along with the licorice tea (really, a dessert tea), Jake had picked up Frank's habit of drinking hazelnut coffee with half and half ("Milk makes the hazelnut too thin and cream makes the hazelnut too thick," Jake had informed Frank after bringing in a large mug of hazelnut coffee one morning).

For his part, Frank had picked up Jake's interest in gourmet cooking. Having some free time to himself, and finding himself in need of a creative outlet, Frank had tried a few simple appetizer dishes. Upon seeing the results, Frank had decided to try more intricate dishes, resulting in his Lady's praises. 

Naturally, the psychologist in him argued, his Lady's praises encouraged him to experiment more, and as a natural outcrop of his new-found ability, Frank decided to encourage Jake's interest in gourmet cooking. Knowing Jake lived alone, Frank had encouraged his team to chip in for the groceries and Jake would whip the team up a gourmet meal once or twice a week. 

The results were excellent: both with the food and with the camaraderie of the team. "The Donovan Effect", as Cody referred to Frank's changed attitude, was merely a reflection of Frank's attempt at getting his team used to Frank's way of running the unit, rather than the way Keller had run the unit. 

And Frank made it a point to join his team for one of Jake's gourmet lunches at least once a week and the team was responding to Frank's presence encouragingly. 

"Mmmm, that feels good."

"I thought you'd like it, m'Lady."

"Rub some here."

"Will do."

"Ohhhh. Make sure you run some here, and here and then use the water massage to get it all over here."

"You like that?"

"Oh, yes, I do."

"You said that on our wedding day."

"And I'll say it again: I do. Rub some here, and here, and here."

"Hey watch it mister!" a male voice shouted and interrupted Frank's thoughts. He looked around and saw that he wasn't the focal point of the male's voice. He also wasn't in the steaming shower. 

A screech of tires and honking horns filled the intersection. Frank stopped his BMW Z20. He started to unbuckle the seat buckle, but saw that the traffic had started again. Putting his car back into gear, he put his foot onto the gas pedal.

Reaching his home shortly thereafter, Frank took another look at the unscathed tree in his front yard. This was the tree upon which he'd thought two lives had ended. Was there anything he could do, landscaping perhaps, which could prevent something like that from happening in the future?

He studied his front lawn. He could put a strong wood fence with a ditch just behind it, to catch the car. Or he could build up a small earthen berm. But these things he would think about later. 

Pulling the car into the garage, he shut off the engine and sat in his BMW for a moment as the garage door shut, gathering his thoughts. 

He was much in need of his Lady. Up until now, when his Lady had been away for a few days, Frank hadn't thought how much he'd come to rely on her. She was his other half, his grounded half, she was opposite, yet so much a part of himself  

Getting out of his car, he shut and locked the door. Going across to the door, he turned the house alarm off then opened the door and went into the small foyer he had constructed. 

Like the larger foyer opening off the front door, this foyer was a minature replica. Dark, rich wood panelled the walls, a large mirror hung on the left wall and along the right wall, a dark mahogany coat rack stood next to a bookcase--Frank and his Lady loved their books and were always hanging around flea markets in the hopes of finding that one rare first edition. Autographed, of course. 

Taking off his scarf and hanging it upon the coat rack, Frank thought his Lady had the better chance of finding that once in a lifetime rare first edition when she was in New York. The 26th Street flea market was in session every week, and every week someone purchased a treasure. 

Frank next took off his dark grey wool coat and hung it on the coat rack. Glancing at his home security system, he ensured himself he was the only one in the Donovan residence, he opened the door leading into the small anteroom to the kitchen.

He didn't have another word for the small room: the small foyer lead into this small anteroom, which lead into the kitchen. It was too small to be called a family room but the Donovan kids had recently begun to refer to it as 'the reading room.'

The anteroom was, like good sized portions of the Donovan house, panelled in dark mahogany and also lined with bookcases. This room's bookcases, however, were also filled with children's books, for the Donovan children enjoyed reading as their parents cooked up dinner or a snack in the kitchen. 

Frank stopped for a moment and ran his fingers lightly over the selection of titles in the bookcases: DuMaurier, Proust, Alice Walker, Willa Cather, War and Peace, Jane Eyre, Euroda Welty, Ayn Rand, Maurice Sendek, Seuss, The Three Investigators, Nancy Drew, The Hardy Boys. 

Going into the kitchen, he opened the refrigerator and took out the bowl of meat marinading in the burgundy and cognac wines and set it on the counter. Taking out the other ingredients for the boeuf bourguignon, he placed them on the counter and began his preparation of the French dish his mother loved.  ***

"Darling! Did you miss me?"


"What are you doing? I seem to hear chopping sounds."

"Making your dinner, m'Lady."

"What are you making me?"

"You will see when you arrive in Chicago."

"Wait! You're making me dinner at the office?"

"No, I went home early."

"Must have surprised your team."

"I think so. They're calling it the Donovan Effect."

"The Donovan Effect? What does Cody mean by that?"

(Frank chuckles as he chops the mushrooms) "How did you know it was Cody who said that?"

"He'd been trying to get you to have a drink with him for months. Seems like he'd be a bit abrasive."

"Well, you're right. Cody means that by my changing the office procedures, I'm making the team more comfortable about me and lets them know I'm not so aloof."

"You're not aloof with me."

"I know that. I keep my personal life and private lives as separate as possible."

"It's a good thing you do that. Makes me feel more comfortable."

"A man's measure is judged by the way he takes care of his family."

"And you take care of all of us very well. Sometimes I worry I'll lose you."

"Why would you worry about that?" (Frank's brow has furrowed and he has finished chopping the mushrooms and is now finely slicing the garlic)

"I don't know. I guess I feel so, so like I'm not entitled to have you. I don't know how else to explain it."

"Are you worried I'll die?" (Frank knows his Lady has asked the question about his premature death before, but he asks again as he knows this must bother his Lady, for she keeps alluding to the subject--an indication she is really bothered about it)

"Not as much as I used to. I know you'll do everything you can to get out alive and I know you'd give your life to save mine and the kids."

"But you're still worried."

"Yes. Basically, I'm married to a cop. And a cop's wife constantly worries that her man won't be walking in the front door. Think of the police memorial in Washington DC."

"Cop, yes. Dead man, no." (Frank has now switched to slicing onions. His eyes water from slicing the two medium onions. He sniffs involuntarily.)

"Why are you crying, honey? Are you okay?"

(Frank thought for a moment as how to best respond. He knows his Lady will understand immediately when he presents her with his mother's recipe for boeuf bourguignon and she tastes the onions. He decides to go with the truth.) "I'm chopping onions."

"I hate chopping onions. I saw a vegetable chopper on the tv the other day. Think we should get it?"

"I am beginning to think that would be a good idea." (Frank is grateful that the onions only needed to be coarsely chopped and he has switched to chopping carrots)

"Anything would help, although I'd like to be there to kiss those tears of yours away."

(Frank smiles through his drying tears). "You'll be able to kiss me in a few short hours."

"Will the dinner be done by then?"

"Almost. I've timed it so it's to be done about an hour after you get home." (Actually, Frank will put the potatoes in the oven just before he leaves, which will take about an hour to bake.)

"Just enough time for that crannie, what did you call it? And the whisky."

(Frank smiled to himself again. He's not upset his Lady had misunderstood cranachan. Frank himself called it 'cranadan' for about a week after Jake had made it, until the name cranachan stuck in his memory. Actually he'd had to make up a rhyme to remember it, much like mother Danita had taught him to remember things years ago, when he was a child: "there is nothing better than / a large serving of cranadan," he now thought.) 

"Cranachan. It's called cranachan. The fruit parfait has toasted oatmeal, honey, fresh double cream, whisky, and raspberries. Very simple fruit appetizer."

"I do like raspberries. What about the cherries?"

"Those are in the clootie dumplings, which reminds me, I need to take them out of the refrigerator."

(Frank has moved onto the shallots, which he is finely chopping)

"Oh, please! Tell me what's for dinner?" she pleads.

(Frank chuckles) "Not until you get home, young lady."


(Frank decided to change the subject. He knows his Lady is keen on discovering what new gourmet dish Frank is whipping up for this evening's dinner.) "How was Shelters of Stone?"

"Marvelous! Like all of Auel's other books, she really knows how to re-create the world of Ayla and Jondalar."

"You read it for the romance scenes."

"I did not! Auel's an excellent writer. She researches well and her descriptions..."

"Of Ayla and Jondalar getting intimate are really exciting."

"Frank! Sex was a natural part of the world back then. Just as sex is a natural part of the world today."

"Mm hmmm. I've heard otherwise. Auel's books have been banned in some high schools for 'lewdness'.

"It's a well written book. Great characters, wonderful description of the world 25,00 years ago."

"Isn't there some prejudice in there?"

"Yes. Because Ayla was raised with a group of Neanderthals--the Clan--and her background caused a lot of discomfort for her and for Jondalar when Ayla finally met up with other Cro-Magnons."

"And people then didn't like the Neanderthals?" (Frank has yet to read any of Auel's book but he hears of them from his Lady)

"No. At the time the book is set, it's the cusp of the rise of the Cro-Magnons who were displacing the Neanderthals. The cranial features of the Neanderthals may have caused some dissention amongst the Cro-Magnons. How that dissention asserted itself, I don't understand, as there is skeletal evidence suggesting the two groups intermarried. And with Europe's human population scattered and human settlements were few and far in between, any contact with humans should have been welcome."

"Mmmm, hmm. And was she accepted by Jondalar's people?"

"Eventually. There was some arguments over her background, but Ayla, as usual, won the Zeladonii over. There is evidence, however, that Cro-Magnons displaced the native Neanderthals in many places--perhaps the hunting was better, or the fishing." 

(Frank is now placing the ingredients into the bottom of a two-quart casserole) "I see. The superior technology displaced inferior?"

"That's one possible reason. No one is exactly sure why the Neanderthals died out. The skelelal evidence of intermarriage wins many people over and the theory is that the Neanderthals were simply absorbed into the Cro-Magnon population via mixed-race babies."


"Auel presents this theory in The Clan of the Cave Bear when Creb tells of his vision that Ayla's son Durc is the only child of the Clan, because Durc is the key to the Clan's survival. That although the Clan was destined to die out, and Creb saw this, the Clan would continue to live on through Durc, and through other mixed-race children like him."

(Frank smiles at his Lady's explanation) "What's the other theories?"

"Not so good. One is that the Cro-Magnons virtually pushed the Neanderthals to the more undesirable areas of post-Ice Age Europe and resulting from lack of food, the Neanderthals starved to death."

(Something in her voice tells Frank that there is more to her explanation). "Or?"

"Or that the Neanderthals died out because they were adapted to live in a cold climate and when the Ice Age ended, they simply couldn't adapt their nutritional needs to the smaller sized animals."

"Mammoths, giant deer, aurochs."

"Yes. Oversized animals would have provided the large quantities of meat necessary to meet the caloric requirements of a compact, though large, muscled body. And a dozen or so men would need large amounts of animal meat to see them throughout one winter."

"How much meat per man?"

"That's rather subjective. But thinking on the amount an Olympian needs to consume--about six to seven thousand calories per day--and you can get an idea of how much would be needed."

"Several dozen animals just to see a man through the winter?"

"More like a hundred or so of the smaller of the large animals. Three or four good sized mammoths would provide the meat for an entire group to last throughout the winter."

"But not the summer?"

"That's another thing. Large quantities of fish would have been needed, as well as emmer wheat, edible tubers, leaves, cambium."


"The sweet inner bark of certain trees. It's quite good when you are lost in the woods without anything to eat. The sap will keep you alive, for a while."

"I'll make a note to send the team on a survival trek and let them eat cambium."

"You won't go yourself?"

"Had enough of survival in my life. Already know about it."

"You didn't know about cambium."

"That's an arcane subject, dear." 

(Frank smiled again. He has finished arranging the boeuf bourguignon in the casserole dish and as his mother's recipe is for a stove-top version, Frank turned on a burner to high heat, reminding himself that when the liquid begins to bubble, he needs to cover the casserole dish and turn the heat lower. He reminds himself that he needs to take the casserole dish off the burner and put on the back burner to warm just before he leaves to pick up his Lady at the train station.)

"It's vital! Too many people get lost in the woods and starve before they're found. Like those two kids who were stranded up in Alaska by a nefarious bastard and they ended up walking around for a few weeks in the bitter cold. Ended up with frostbite and extreme hunger. The girl had wanted to kill her male friend's dog for food."

(Frank nodded as he remembered the tv movie. He can't remember the name of the movie.) "Why didn't they clear some undergrowth and build a fire? Surely the forest rangers would have noticed a fire in the middle of winter."

"Well, there's two lines of thought on doing that, dear. One is that in the middle of winter, there's no dry wood available and the melting snow would preclude a fire."

"And the other thought?"

"The other line of thinking is that there are, in the higher altitudes, stands of pine, and the lowest pine branches remain virtually dry even in the wettest conditions. Auel makes use of that theory in her fourth book, The Plains of Passage."

(Frank chuckles) "Could you quote me a page number so I could go look it up?"

"Frank! Stop teasing me!"  (his Lady laughs and causes Frank to give a good natured laugh and Frank raised his arm, scaring a sparrow which had landed on the kitchen windowsill and was looking in the closed window. Frank notices and goes over to the loaf of sour dough bread and taking it out, he breaks off a small chunk. The sparrow, having been fed bread (and french fries) by humans before, knows it is about to get a free feed and so hovers around the windowsill, flapping his wings. Frank goes to the window, and opens it with one hand.)

"Couldn't they rub two sticks together?" (The sparrow is hovering just outside the window as Frank throws the small chunk of sour dough bread out the window. The sparrow divebombs the bread and begins to tear at it hungrily. Frank laughs again--heartily.)

"...would be possible. Frank, dahling! What are you laughing at?"

"Just feeding a stray sparrow which has landed on the windowsill."


"Jake's Sour Dough bread."

"Ah. His secret recipe."

"His very good recipe. Better than my mother made."

"Now that's a tall order to fill, Frank Donovan!"

"He's done it, somehow. Don't know how, but the bread just tastes different from my mother's recipe. I brought home a loaf so I could compare it to the loaf I made from my mother's recipe." 

(Frank doesn't know that Jake has used sour goat's milk, although Jake has considered telling Frank this.)

"Worse? No, you said better than your mothers."

(Frank hears the 1/2 bottle of burgundy and cognac bubbling and he goes over to the stove and turns the heat down lower, then covers the casserole dish.)

"Richer. Denser." 



"I guess I'll have to wait a few hours and taste it for myself."

"I'll put out some cheese."

"Cheddar and roquefort?"

"That I will." 

(Frank made a note to himself to run to the gourmet convenience store a dozen streets over. He's rather pleased with the new, albeit smallish, convenience store: it stocked a lot of gourmet foods, both prepared meals and the ingredients to make one's own gourmet meal. The neighborhood children tended to avoid hanging around the store, mainly because it served a largely adult clientele, but mostly because the store didn't have such food items as their budgets could purchase, save for a single soda or two.)

"Mmmm, I'm wishing I'd skipped lunch. Craniehan, cheddar, roquefort and Jake's Sour Dough bread."

"Cranachan. And lunch was?"

"Chicken salad, chef salad, fruit and bread."

"If you hadn't eaten, your blood sugar would have dropped. Then you would have either fainted or turned a temper tantrum."

"I prefer the fainting, thank you."

"Is that better than becoming argumentative?"

"Yes. Much preferable. The symptoms of low blood sugar don't always present the textbook way that doctors prefer."

"So fainting is your body's preferred method."

"Fainting is my preferred method of my body letting me know I need to eat. At least people know what to do when someone faints. With the argumentativeness, people just think I'm evil-tempered or that I'll hurt them by being off on a bender. And, to make matters worse, I don't always realize that I need to eat when I start arguing with people."

"Given those circumstances, I'd probably prefer fainting as well."

"But lunch is over with, and I'm back in my small cabin, stretched out on the bed and talking to you."

"They didn't put the bed up for the day?"

"They did, but I took it down again, although I won't be using it tonight."

"Our bed."

"Yes, I'll be in our bed."

"Or elsewhere."

"Elsewhere? Oh, Frank! By the fireplace? Could we have a campout by the fireplace?"

(Frank smiles hugely. He has paused in his cooking activities and is watching the sparrow finish his small chunk of Jake's bread.) "If you want."


"I'll consider it."

"Please? Please?"

"We shall see."

(Lady D's voice has gone sultry and she's trying to get his attention)

"Frank? Could we pretty please camp out by the fireplace?"

(Frank strokes his bearded chin. He had already made plans to camp out by the fireplace but his Lady didn't know that). "That's a strong possiblity."

(He's going to hold out for something that he wants from his Lady; something he won't admit to the rest of his team under any circumstances, and like the gourmet cooking, he got the idea from Jake.)

"If I throw in a pedicure for you?"


"You're cheap."

"I am not."

"I was going offer both a pedicure and a manicure."

"You can still offer both."

"Only if you ask me, later on."

"I'll do that, later on."



(Lady D chuckles then her chuckle goes suddenly soft in Frank's ear) "Honey? Can you hear me?"

"Barely. You're fading in and out."

(Lady D's voice is louder) "I wish Cody could rig us up something to stop this static!"

(Frank talks louder) "I'll have him look into it. But you're going out of range. We need to get a nationwide carrier."

"That's for sure. What's the one we want? The one by Sprint?"

"I'll look into it this afternoon."

"Good deal. See you soon!"

"Love you!"

"Love...!" (but Lady D's voice has faded out.) ***

Frank clicked off the cell phone and removed the headset from his ear. He put the headset down on the counter. 

The sparrow was on the windowsill, obviously hoping for another handout. Frank broke off another small chunk and tossed it through the still-open window. The sparrow dived for the bread again. 

"You like that bread don't you? Tastes better than my mother's," Frank told the small bird, who was momentarily startled by a larger bird--a crow--which landed on the ground near the sparrow. The tiny bird took his bread in his beak and flew off, leaving the crow confused. 

Frank broke off another small chunk of bread and threw it to the crow, who gobbled it down before flapping his wings and flying off. 

"I really must get Jake's recipe," Frank said to the departing crow. "It's really good sour dough bread." He shut the window, locked it, then he went into the small anteroom--the kids' reading room--and walked to the stereo system. Flipping on the stereo, the strains of Herb Alpert's Spanish Fly start filling the small room. Humming along to the trumpeter's 60's hit, Frank went back into the kitchen.

Spying some clothing lying on top of the trash can, waiting to be thrown out, Frank went over and picked up his daughter's favorite white long shirt. Olivia had a predilection towards wearing long shirts, and her favorite color at this time was white, much to Frank's relief, for just a few months ago, Olivia's favorite color had been a rather unusual shade of a bright apple green--very difficult to match.. 

Olivia's shirt was stained with chocolate. His Lady had tried to get the stain out but an ugly, rather large brown stain ran down the front of the shirt in a wide stripe. 

Frank chuckled as he carried the shirt to the sink. Taking the sink stopper and plugging the drain, he next took a bottle of water softener and poured a few cupfuls into the sink. Still humming to Spanish Fly, Frank rubbed water softener on the chocolate stain for a minute, then rinsed the shirt well.

He smiled hugely when he saw that his mother's trick of using water softening to get chocolate stains out worked well and that Olivia's favorite white shirt would be hanging in her closet.

"Oh! This smells delicious!" Lady Donovan commented as she took off her dark grey wool coat. Underneath, she wore a dark green knee length wool dress, the color complimenting her dark hair and taupe shaded grey eyes. Her small feet were shod in new Guccis: short heeled black leather. Her wide mouth was rouged with a dark red matte lipstick that Frank found rather nice. He also thought the lipstick was a new shade for his Lady. 

Frank took his Lady's coat and hung it on the coat rack. Lady also took off her scarf--a matching plaid to Frank's--and Frank took it from her, kissed her, then put the scarf on the table. 

"What does my Lady want to do now?" Frank asked, smiling, as he held his Lady in his arms. He was hoping she was feeling a bit more loved since she had hung up the phone. 

The couple had enjoyed a nice drive home from the train station, with Lady phoning their kids to tell them she was home. 

The kids, each in turn, had said "hello, mummy! Glad you're home. We've missed you and we've been having lots of fun. Games and movies and such. Bye mummy! We must be going to Shabbat services now! Love you! Bye!"

Lady had pouted as she turned off the cell phone but Frank had leaned over and planted a kiss on her matte colored lips. "Better?" he had asked. 

"A bit. They don't seem to have missed me much." 

"They did, but they had fun," Frank had said and for the rest of the drive home, Lady had filled the short drive home with details about her business trip. "Oh, the Rockies are so beautiful in Montana! I can't believe there's a toxic open pit mine that in less than twenty years will overflow with water and poison Butte!" 

Frank's mind came back to the present as he heard his Lady saying, "You know what I want."

"That I do. But first, I must attend to the potatoes," he said in crisp tones, reminiscent of a military man. The two entered the kitchen. 

"You weren't afraid to leave them in the oven? That something wouldn't burn?" 


As Frank went to the oven, Lady Donovan looked over the sideboard loaded with food. "Is this the cranachan?" she asked, pointing to the tall parfait glasses filled with the whipped fresh cream and raspberries.

Frank glanced at the sideboard while taking the potatoes out of the oven. "Yes. It should be served at room temperature."

Lady dipped her finger into the fluffy mound of whipped cream, honey and whisky, then put her finger into her mouth. "Ooohhhhhhhh, yes! This is good." She took a stray raspberry off the top of one of the parfait glasses and popped it into her mouth.

Frank walked over with a large platter. "Good, eh? Jake likes his version better."

"Undoubtedly. Ohh! Those potatoes smell wonderful!" Lady took her finger and scooped up a larger portion of the cranachan then held her finger in the air enticingly. Frank smiled at her and opened his mouth to laugh. Lady popped her wipped-cream-with-honey-and-whisky covered finger into Frank's mouth. 

Frank smiled around his Lady's finger. She extracted her finger and asked, "Good?" Frank swallowed the fingerful of cream. 

"Yes. And these are three cheese stuffed potatoes." He held the platter up for her inspection. 

"Cheddar, roquefort and?"

"Monterey," Frank said and placed the platter onto the sideboard. He kissed his Lady, then extracted himself from her arms and went back to the oven. Lady watched him pull a covered dish from the warmer burner on the back of their rather expensive chef stove--the appliance had cost $7200 and Lady had emitted quite the shocked, though pleased, squeal when Frank had presented her with his gift to her. Frank had insisted the Donovan household possess a proper stove for his excursions into the culinary world. 

Lady pouted. "You don't love me." She tilted the toes of her right foot towards the floor and described a circle on the dark wood floor. 

"Of course I love you, m'Lady," Frank said, his back still turned. He took the cover off the casserole dish.

"Ohhhhh, boeuf bourguignon! Frank, you didn't! Your mother's recipe?"

"But I did. And yes," he said, turning to face his Lady and carried the steaming French dish over to the sideboard. Steam rose off the bubbling liquid.

"Let's eat now!" Lady said as Frank put the casserole dish onto the sideboard. He took his forefinger and wiped a smear of whipped cream off his Lady's cheek. She smiled and hugged Frank, running her hands up and down Frank's back. "Did I tell you that you have the most exquisite taste in clothes? I really don't know how you do it, darling. Mixing this color with that color and blending your fabrics so well! I'm so uncoordinated."

Frank stroked his Lady's hair gently. "Instinct? Innate knowledge? Anything is possible."

"Your mother didn't have that trait. She tended to wear dark colors all the time."

"That she did."

"Was that the wartime clothing rations that made her so uncoordinated?"

"I  never thought of it like that, but I don't think so. My mother did tend to prefer to wear earth tones."

"Dark earth tones."

"That she did," Frank said and extracted himself from his Lady's arms. "Champagne?"

"I thought we were having whisky!" 

"Only in the cranachan," he replied as he took a large napkin off Tiffany's "Rock Cut" ice bucket. 

"The Dom!" 

"Yes, presenting Dom," Frank said quietly as he popped the cork off the champagne. The bubbly came over the rim of the bottle and fizzed--"happily," Frank crazily thought--down the side of the bottle. He filled two fluted champagne glasses--again from Tiffany's (a wedding present)--and held out one glass to his Lady. 

She took the profferred glass carefully in her manicured fingers and sipped, smiling at Frank over the rim of the crystal. 

"Mmmm. Love you," she said when she had swallowed her mouthful of the Dom. "But I don't think you'll give me what I want." She pouted again. "Can we have the cranachan for dessert? I'd love to pop raspberries into your mouth. We can have the chocolate souffle later." 

"Of course. You are fetching when you pout."

"Mmmm. Maybe. I do need some convincing."

"But I do have a surprise for you." Frank's eyes glittered mischievously. 

"You didn't?"

"Again, but I did. Shall we prepare trays and dine Japanese style in front of the fireplace?" 

"You remembered our Tokyo trip during our first year of marriage," she said softly, her eyes glistening. "How we went in the winter and took a train trip across Japan," her eyes grew misty as she remembered that trip. She'd been terrified of the plane flight, but had slept during most of it. Frank had surprised her upon their arrival with tickets for a train trip.

"Reminding you, perhaps, of the tiny village where we stopped off to see Mount Fuji topped with snow?" Frank asked as he pulled other large napkins off two lacquered Japanese serving trays. He took up a crystal plate (Tiffany's Rock Cut crystal set claimed an honored place in the Donovan residence), and handed it to his Lady. He took the other plate and served himself. 

"Yes. That was a a good part of the trip. The fireplace, the snow on Mount Fuji."


Lady smiled. "And you. I'm glad that I decided to take the Tokyo trip with you." 

"Took some convincing," Frank replied as he placed a cheese turnover onto his plate. 

Lady nodded as she took one of the two stuffed potatoes and placed the steaming root vegetable onto her crystal plate. "Yes, it did. I'm glad you convinced me and that I didn't let my fear of flying stop me from having a great vacation." 

She took up the silver ladle from beside the steaming casserole dish. Lading up some of the boeuf bourguignon, she carefully tilted the ladle over her plate. The thinly sliced beef and  chopped vegetables thick with liquid dropped onto her plate. Glancing at Frank, she said, "I know that overcoming one's fears makes for a healthier life. Besides, I don't want our kids to go through life wondering why their mother refused to go on vacation with them."

Frank nodded. "I know it was hard to fly over the Pacific," as he took the other stuffed potato and placed it on his plate. 

Lady's slender boned hand hovered over the cheese turnover. "What's this, dear?" She wanted to forget the plane flight to Tokyo and focus on her upcoming evening with her husband. Frank glanced at her. 

"Swiss cheese in crust. It's a Craig Claiborne recipe."

"Now he was a connoisseur of food. He died, you know," Lady said as she took one of the cheese turnovers and placed it on her plate. 

Frank was ladling the boeuf bourguignon onto his plate. He nodded. "I read the New York Times article."

"Not the Wall Street Journal article?" Lady asked as she held her full crystal plate up for Frank's inspection. He smiled at her.

"WSJ's article as well, m'Lady."

The couple set their plates onto the lacquered serving trays. 

"Don't forget the cranachan," Lady said. "I want to feed you raspberries." Frank smiled and set a parfait glass of cranachan on his serving tray and his Lady mirrored his action. They went into the sunken living room. 

"Oh Frank! This is lovely! Where did you find those tables?" Lady asked as they each set their serving tray down onto one of the two, low dark magoghany tables placed in front of the fireplace.


"Mmm hmmm. Where?"

"Pout for me again."

Lady pouted. 

Frank smiled and said, "Truthfully, it was Cody who found the tables while browsing on the internet."

Lady raised her eyebrows in imitation of Frank's well known gesture. "From a catalog?"

Frank shook his head, and went to the gas fireplace. Kneeling, he flipped the switch and watched as the clean gas flame rose about a foot over the remarkably true to life 'logs'. "From an antique seller in Tokyo."

"These are authentic? Are you sure?" Lady asked, kneeling on the cushions Frank had placed around the tables earlier in the grey Chicago afternoon. 

"Yes. Authentic. From an Ebay seller."

"These were on Ebay? They're lovely!" Lady said as she ran her finger over the lustrous dark wood. And the tables were lovely. Rising just eleven inches off the floor, each of the two table's four legs were intricately carved with dragon heads and lotuses. 

"Just as my Lady is lovely," Frank said. "I'll go get our champagne glasses." He left the room and returned shortly carrying their champagne glasses.

Lady pitched her voice low and sultry. "Thought you'd never get back."

"It was a dangerous trip indeed," Frank agreed. "The hazards I had to endure, the fierce natives shaking spears at me as I fought my way through the furniture, dodging the chairs, avoiding the wrath of the sideboard's corners," he intoned seriously, but his dark brown eyes held a twinkle.

Lady's silvery laugh filled the living room as Frank handed his Lady her champagne glass. The gas-flame fireplace (straight out of Pottery Barn) burned merrily. He kneeled carefully on the plush black velvet floor cushion opposite his Lady, balancing his champagne glass in his hand. 

Lifting his glass in the air, he said, "A toast to m'Lady. Health and happiness to us and to our children."

"Hear," Lady said, raising her own champagne glass and the couple sipped their champagne.

Later, after their early meal, Frank was lying with his head across his Lady's lap. She had kicked off her short heeled Guccis, and she was feeding him raspberries from her parfait glass of cranachan. One by one she placed the raspberries into Frank's mouth. 

"Did I ever tell you you have the nicest teeth?" she asked of her husband, running her forefinger down the front of the bluish grey cashmere sweater Frank wore. 

"Don't think so. May I have another?" he asked, crossing his ankles. His own feet were also shod in black leather Guccis. Lady nodded, ran her finger down Frank's thigh, clad in dark grey wool pants.

"But of course!" Lady said as she popped a raspberry into Frank's mouth. "You are on a dark grey wool kick today, aren't you?" 

Frank nodded in response. 

"You want me to slip your shoes off?" Lady asked and again Frank nodded, smiling at her.

She reached over to untie his Guccis. 

"Mmmmm. Is that Charlie I detect?" Frank asked as first one, then the other Gucci came off Frank's sock clad feet. 

"Yes. I found a sample size tucked into my luggage. Wonder who did that?" she asked innocently as she straightened up and smoothed Frank's hair from his forehead. She leaned over and kissed his forehead. 

"Yes. Wonder who did that?" he asked of her. 

"I never really liked Charlie before. I always associated the scent with those rad ads from the 70's. I was a teenager then, and went au naturel with my scents."

"Meaning you used the milk and honey shampoos?"

Lady chuckled. "Yes. I wanted the Farrah look. Had the hairstyle too. And the color. Worst thing I ever did to my hair. I bleached it so much, I had to cut it all off by 1979. Tomboy cut."

Frank levelled a look at his Lady. "That type of cut wouldn't suit your features."

"Tell me. My hair was no longer than an inch and a half at the most. Took me years to grow it out again."

"The results were worth it."

"But now I have to color it," Lady pouted her lips again.

"I think the silver streaks at your temples are lovely," Frank said softly, as he reached up and ran his finger down his Lady's cheeks.

"I'd rather not have the silver streaks," Lady said again, still pouting.

Frank smiled. "But they match my own streaks."

Lady looked doubtful. She picked up another stray raspberry from her parfait glass of cranachan and slipped it past Frank's slightly parted lips. "We can be twins?"

"That we can," replied Frank when he was able to talk after swallowing the proffered raspberry. The gas flame highlighted the silver streaks at Frank's temples. Lady ran her fingers over the silver streaks.

"Well, when you put it that way, I guess it wouldn't be so bad," Lady agreed and pouted again. "Still, I wish I didn't have to go grey."

"I could dye my own hair," Frank suggested as he allowed his Lady to stroke her fingers over his silvering temple. 

Lady ran her forefinger lightly down Frank's neck. Upon reaching the edge of the turtleneck sweater, she dipped her finger between the sweater and the fabric and ran her finger around the edge of the fabric. 

"Mmmm. You've never done that before," Frank murmurred, closing his eyes and tilting his head back. 

"Feel good?"

"Yes. You've got a light touch."

Lady bent her head down and kissed Frank. "Mmmmm," she said. 

The cell phone buzzed. Lady popped her head up and glared daggers towards the kitchen.  Her mood was souring. 

"I'll get that," Frank suggested and first sat up, then got up and went out into the kitchen. 

"Kids!" Frank's voice floated back and Lady's sour mood improved instantly. She jumped up from the floor cushions, and her nylon feet padded quickly over the thick cream carpet and into the kitchen. 

"I wanna talk!" she chirped at Frank who was nodding and smiling. "Olivia?" she mouthed at Frank, who smiled wider and gave a thumbs up gesture. 

"Yes. I know the prayers," he told his daughter. "Do you want to talk to mummy?"

Squeals erupted from the earpiece of the cell phone. Frank handed the phone to his wife. "Olivia! Uh, huh! That's great darling! I'm so glad you remembered the words in Hebrew," she paused. "Yes, yes, you're learning Hebrew quite nicely, dear. You're quite articulate!" she paused again to listen to her daughter. Frank smiled at his wife and, deciding to brew some after dinner tea, he went over to the stove and popped the teapot onto the burner. 

"Sweetie! Slow down, please. I'm a slow learner of languages. Monolinguistic. What's that? Oh, Maw. No. Linguistic. It's my own made-up word, sweetie. It means that I only speak one language well. Yes. English."

Frank smiled as he made the preparations for licorice tea. He was silently cursing the gourmet convenience store for not stocking the licorice tea in loose form, for he had learned the English way of "making a proper cup of tea" as his mother Danita often intoned in her later years to her many visitors, both foreign and English born. 

He continued to listen to his Lady's side of the conversation with Olivia and wondered with one side of his mind what his daughter was asking to prompt his Lady's happy responses. The other side reflected upon his mother: her eyes which so matched his own, and smoky dark looks had won her, in her post-war youth, many an admirer. 

"Mmm, hmmm. And you'll do what?" Lady inquired into the cell phone's mouthpiece. "And then what? Mmmm hmmm. Well, I hope you have a wonderful time tonight dear. Me too. Why not?" Lady's lips pouted. "He does? What did he eat? Oh, dear!" 

Frank glanced up at his Lady's last words. He motioned for her attention. "What's wrong?" he mouthed.

"He ate some bad chicken," Lady mouthed back. Into the mouthpiece, she said, "He has?"

Lady looked at Frank. He mouthed "Pepto bismol."

Lady nodded, her dark, shoulder length hair swinging. "Sweetie? He'll be fine. Sweetie? Sweetie? Yes, does the Temple have pepto bismol? Yes," she chuckled. "Yes. That's the thick pink stuff mummy has in her bathroom cabinet. Okay, I'll wait."

She smiled at Frank and smiled back then said softly, "I'll get the pepto and you get the car keys." Lady nodded. Frank left the kitchen. 

"No? Sweetie, mummy and daddy will drop by the Temple and bring our bottle. Yes, yes, dear. We'll be there inside of ten minutes. Now don't worry, sweetie. Yes, love you too. Bye." Lady clicked off the cell phone and went over to the stove to turn off the burner. 

Coming back into the kitchen, the new bottle of pepto bismol in his hand, Frank said, "Ready?" 

"Let's go," as the two went into the small foyer off the garage and put on their outer winter gear. Taking the car keys from the key rack, he heard his Lady moan. 

"We forgot our shoes!" and Frank looked down. Sure enough, his feet were clad only in his black cashmere blend socks. 

"I'll get them," Lady volunteered and Frank nodded. Sitting down on a small stool next to the bookcase, Frank awaited his Lady's return. 

"Those shoes suit you admirably," he said as Lady handed him first one, then the other Gucci.

"You do know how to pick out my shoes," she said as Frank slipped his shoes on. "Let's go see our kids. Then we can come back, and you know."

Frank raised his eyebrows,, then leaned down slightly to kiss his Lady on her lips. 

"Let's go see our kids," he agreed, and the two Donovan adults went out into the garage and got into Frank's black late-model BMW Z20. 

Much later, snuggled in their bed under the sapphire colored silk sheets, Lady gave a small sigh as she ran her hand over Frank's bare chest. She ran her foot up and down Frank's right calf. He smiled appreciatively. 

"Now that was what I call dessert!" she whispered into his ear. 

"I'm learning to cook rather well, aren't I?" Frank asked rather seriously and Lady playfully gave a light slap on Frank's chest. "Owww!" he said, feigning a severely pained look on his face. 

"Want me to make it better?" Lady asked, her voice again low and sultry. 

"But of course," as he turned and took his Lady into his arms. "Mi amour, enchante," Frank whispered as the couple danced the age old dance of love under the silken sheets.  ***

The small sparrow roused himself from his sleep. He had liked the bread the male human in this house had fed him and the sparrow had decided to avail himself of the house's rather spacious arborial accomodations in the front yard.  

He was perched on a branch overlooking the Donovan master bedroom. A star peered down on the sparrow as he watched for a short while the scene inside the Donovans room. He snugged his head down into his neck again and was soon fast asleep.

"Jake, you know you need to invest in a restaurant!" Monica said as she helped herself to another heaping serving chili.

"Yeah, Jake. Even your chili is better than what they serve down in Texas," Cody agreed as he too served himself another bowl. He made his way back to the couch and sat down carefully. 

"Nothing like chili on a cold night," Alex agreed as she took up a slice of bread. Buttering it, she asked, "Wonder what Frank's doing?"

Monica giggled. "He's probably holed up somewhere, nursing a whisky." 

"We're holed up here, in Jake's apartment. He could have come down for another drink," Cody complained as he popped open a beer. The dark lager headed nicely and the white foam bubbled over the bottle's rim. Pouring the lager into a tall pilsner glass, Cody picked up the lager and sipped. 

"Now, what do you think he's doing? Really?"  Jake asked, looking around at the team scattered in his living room. On the tv screen, scenes from Austin Powers were showing. "He's doing man stuff. He has normal instincts you know."

"Frank? Normal instincts?" Alex inquired, the piece of buttered bread halfway to her mouth. 

"That's the Donovan Effect again," Cody said and the rest of the team groaned in unison. 

"Not again!" Monica said, rolling her eyes. 

"Yes, again!" Cody insisted.

Jake and Alex chuckled. Jake too helped himself to another bowl of chili and sat down to watch the rest of the Austin Powers movie. 

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